Martha Stewart, eat your heart out.

This is a really long winded post, I won�t be offended if you skip this one. Ok, I will be offended, but I will understand. Just be thankful that I am not posting all those found photo�s directly on this page, but have used my limited knowledge of HTML to link to them.

I love to decorate. If you ask my son, I over do it. As these pics from what I call "the bond" room will attest. I am also cheap, so none of the following cost me very much to do. I mostly used things I already had, and rigged up what I didn�t.

A little background.

My son was really into James Bond, and not just the new stuff, but he would rent the old stuff with Roger Moore and Sean Connery. He was 7, so it was a bit strange. So when he said he wanted a James Bond room, I ran with it.

I painted the border (since Wal-mart doesn't sell 007 borders) and made my own stencils from covers of all the James Bond books, and of course the logo. Then I printed all the book covers and framed them and hung them above the border. I painted his dresser and put phrases from the movies all over it. Things like "shaken not stirred". You get the idea. I copied autographs of all the actors who ever played James Bond and transferred them on one wall. Most people would stop there....but not me.

I had to do this. This is the actual size of my son at the time, made from huge stencils and transferred on the door. At this point my son said "STOP", it had been a week and he wanted his room back. I was spent anyway, the stencils for the border were the most time consuming, some of them were 4 colors, so I had to do them 4 times. I was very pleased with myself, but as luck would have it, we didn't live there for very long and I am sorry I didn't take better pictures of it.

When we moved back to town, my son picked a very easy theme (hockey) so it took me a day to do his room. But one night ....really late, I was sitting at my desk thinking �I should re-stain this thing�. This made me go and look to see if I had any left. I did, it was a stain and varnish in one, the color was pecan. I opened the can to see how much was left and spilled some. I grabbed the first thing I could find and cleaned it up. Now I had an old t-shirt full of stain, and for some reason, I rubbed it on the wall. Must have been the devil in me, but I looked at it, and it looked good. So, at 1am I started to rag roll my bedroom with this stain. I thought it looked great.

The next day, my brother walked in and said, "looks like dirt".

WHAT? Hmmmm it does look like dirt. Now I am in decorator mode. What goes with dirt? Leaves! I searched the internet and found pictures of fall leaves and made stencils. As an application for all my newly made stencils, I decided to make a canopy for my bed. (something all little girls dream of) I had a brand new set of sheets, and I proceeded to stencil fall leaves on them. What you have to understand is that this was in the wee hours of the morning, and you just can't go out and buy material, but when I get into these moods, I just use whatever is handy.

I don't always do things the right way, but I always get them done. So now I have the canopy up. Now the walls look bare. I start to stencil leaves falling off the top of window sills and door frames. I am totally out of control now.

There is also a window in my room that looks out onto the door that the upstairs tenant uses. When she forgets to turn out the light it shines right into my bedroom, keeping me from sleep. So, I put mac-tak, (that sticky shelf paper?) on the glass and stenciled leaves on that.

Now it is 3am. I am looking at the windows wondering what I am going to do for curtains. I get a brainstorm, a week before I was at a yard sale at a lumber yard and for some reason I made a weird purchase. I bought window pane frames. These are for when you have one big frame and you want the look of an older 6 or 8 pane window. I bought a whole stack of them. Why? I have no idea.

Now, I dug them out and lo and behold, they fit exactly into the window openings in my bedroom. Which is freaky, because this house is over 100 years old and you can never find anything to fit anything here. So while I watch Steel Magnolias on Showtime, I paint the frames and staple the leftover sheets to the back of them and (you guessed it) stenciled leaves on it. This is the result. I liked it so much, I did it in the living room too.

I literally did my room in two days. I was possessed. Once I start something, I can�t stop, I think it is a little of the OCD. But I have to do things, until they are finished. The next week I decided on a Friday night at 9 or so, I needed a headboard to go with my new "fall" room, so I picked up some 1x3's and made this. (notice that keeping with the theme, I also did the beadspread) This impressed even me, because I didn't wait for the right tools for the job, I just did it. I didn't even have a level, so it is a little wonky, but I think it works.

One last note, I have to show you one more thing, I saw this in a magazine and had to make them. They are book shelves. Get it?

Ok, boring story over. Continue on with your lives. I don�t think Martha Stewart needs to worry about her job�..although they may need someone to take over while she is in the pen.

A picture is worth...

I am on a mission tonight, and probably a lot of nights to come. I can't seem to find our old family photos. I know I stole confiscated appropriated.... lets just say, I was the last person to have them. When I blogged the other night about my time in foster care, I realized that there are pictures out there, and I have no idea where they are. So, I will be hunting them down, in between my day job and night job of trying to get my sisters books done. Hell, I will make time...it is driving me crazy not knowing where they are.

Men in Kilts

I just got a better pic of my brothers at the Kilted Golf Tournament, and since my ISP's ftp site is so fucking hard to get through, to I feel like I have done enough work to warrant a post here.




Kevin, David, Paul & Chris

Some good news for a change.

'We've Been Waiting,' They Say After 3 Days Underground

Back biting on BB3.

What a bunch of petty people. They sit around laughing about how gross Gerry is ��he doesn�t wash his hands�, �he doesn�t use soap when he does�, �that scum in the hot tub must be from Gerry�s hemorrhoid cream� �oh I saw him double dipping his chips� collective �EEEWWW�.

I just can�t get over it. It must be great being so perfect. I wish just one of them would pipe up and say�.�Ok, show of hands ladies. How many of you women have NEVER sucked dick�? And you are worried about Gerry not washing his hands? PULEESE! We were treated last night with Lisa instructing the other women on how to give the perfect blow job. Apparently she hasn�t got a problem with the dick directly in her mouth, but she draws the line at the man touching it and then touching her food. What a classy chick.

I have personally witnessed most of them doing something gross.

Chiara dragging her nasty ass across the kitchen counter.

Eric dropping stuff on the floor and putting it back in the fridge.

Amy sneezing into the dish towel and continuing to dry the dishes with it.

Lisa adjusting her thong and then making sandwiches. And she is constantly popping zits on Eric�s back without ever going and washing up afterwards.

Roddy farts constantly, in and out of the hot tub.

Danielle wiping her nose and then tossing salad with her hands.

Josh has gone to the can more than once and not washed his hands afterwards.

The only 2 people that are meticulous about washing before and after handling anything are Jason and Marcellus. They are also the ones who refrain from joining in on the back biting. Jason going so far as to defend Gerry saying, �we all have our quirks.� To which the group promptly tells him to shut up.

I don�t think it has as much to do with hygiene as it has with Gerry not being one of the �beautiful people�. Everyone else is obsessed with their looks. Plucking, tweezing, moisturizing and exfoliating.

And that�s just the men.

Once upon a time.

When I was 5, my father was drinking heavily, my mother had just had her last of 6 children and with no help coming from my father, she snapped.

Long story short, we all ended up in foster care, and my mother went to stay with her sister and get her head together. The social worker was very nice about it, told my mother that she would make sure we were well taken care of till she was better able to cope.

My little brother was not yet 2, I was 5 and my older sister was 8. My older brothers were, I think, 10, 11 and 12.


Obviously we could not all stay together. My little brother went one place. Me and my sister went to live with a family in town, and my brothers went to stay at a farm in the country. She was only gone for 7 months, but it effected us all differently. I don�t remember a lot about it, there are things that I remember vividly and others not so vividly.

I remember�

- My sister and I waving to our dad as he drove away, certain that he would be right back.

- Go-go boots and batons.

- Dough boys. It seemed like our foster mother made them everyday, but I am sure that is not true.

- Feeding said dough boys to the dog under the table because �she� wouldn�t let us leave the table till they were gone.

- Being dressed up in tutus and paraded in front of �her� friends.

- �Her� saying, �Aren�t they precious, the poor little things.�

- Missing my brothers.

- Visiting my brothers one day and skating on the pond. (not sure if this really happened or I just dreamed it, I do remember missing them so much.)

- Recording messages and songs for my father so he wouldn�t feel so alone.

- Begging my father to take me with him after one of his weekly visits.

- Being tricked into going to get the tapes I had made for him, while he quietly, slipped out.

- Crying all night long for my Dad. (I don�t ever remember wondering where my mother was.)

- Wearing hand me down clothes from our foster mothers �real� children.

- Getting my picture in the paper during a concert at the church.

- Going to pick up my little brother after my mother came back, and having to leave him that first time because he wouldn�t let go of the woman�s leg. He was only 2 and to him 7 months was a lifetime, he had no idea who we were.

- The look on my mothers face as we drove away leaving him behind.

- Coming back the next day with the biggest green, plastic racecar I had ever seen, to bribe him into coming home with us.

- The look of relief on my mothers face.

Even after all that, my father didn�t quit drinking. It wasn�t till I was two months shy of my 13th birthday, that he finally kicked it.

I remember him getting his first year medallion. It was about the size of a silver dollar and on the front it had AA, Easy Does It, First Things First. And on the back was his name and the day he stopped drinking. (Sept 18, 1978) I remember how proud he was that day, one year later, when he was presented with it. He and my mother got all dressed up to go to the dinner. I remember the grey tweed jacket he wore. He carried that medallion in his pocket, so when he felt like he was slipping, he could reach in and hold it and remember why it was important that he not take that drink.

Years later, when he got really sick, we were in his hospital room, and he looked at me and started to cry. I asked him what was wrong, and he said, �I love you.� and cried even harder.

He said, �I know I have never said that to you before and I�m sorry.� I told him, �Dad, you never had to say it, you always made me feel it.� He reached into his robe pocket and passed me the medallion and I cried, because I knew what it meant to him. A lot was going on in our family in those months, more than I can go into here, and he knew that I was filled with rage. He said that I should carry it with me, and when things got bad, to hold it and hopefully it would make me feel better.

It never did. I still have the rage, and whenever I look at the medallion it just makes me cry. To think that my father and mother had gone through so much, only to have it taken away in the end, by one of the people who they should have been able to count on. Those who don�t know the in�s of this story will have no idea what that last part means, but I had to put it down for myself. To put it out there, that I do not forgive and will never forget.

My mother forgave, she said that she forgave that person because it was hurting her not to. I don�t agree, I think some people do not deserve forgiveness. My father put it this way, �Don�t worry about it, everyone gets what they deserve.� That didn't help me either, I wanted them to get what they deserved now.

I don�t dwell on it, but I hope that the person I speak of doesn�t take the fact that I am not outwardly hostile to him as a sign of forgiveness. Forgiveness was not mine to give, it was my fathers, and he can�t give it now. The moment when my rage hit its peak, was the moment my father breathed his last. I was with him and he looked at me, his eyes glazed over and coughed softly and that was it. If the person of whom I speak had been there at that moment I would have strangled him with my bare hands.

I know in my heart that if my father hadn't had so much hardship at the end, he would have lived longer, the doctors said as much. My father had wanted to be "layed out" in his home, but that right was taken from him too. I will never forgive that person for robbing me of even a second of my fathers life, or from denying him his last wish.

The Campbells Win!



These are my brothers.

Every year they enter as a team in the Festival of the Tartans kilted golf tournament. They have won it more than once but this is the first time they have actually been pictured in the paper. Usually it is the country club big wigs that get mentioned. And unless said big wigs win, they don't even mention who it was that did win.

This year was no different. There were two pictures on two different pages of some of the local mucky mucks, but no mention of who actually won the tournament.

However, this year I was PMSing and I wrote an angry email to the paper asking, "who do you gotta blow to get mentioned in your publication.?"

See? Sometimes it is advantageous to have a bitch in the family.

Call display. The double edge sword.

If I was smart I would be doing bookwork right now. And I had every intention of starting tonight when �he� called. �He� is my boss.

Every time the phone rings and I look at that little grey box and see �his� name, I cringe inwardly. Do I answer it and take the crap he is dishing out or pretend I am not home and take the crap in the morning?

One of two tings could happen.

1. he gets over it. (ya like I have a hope in hell that that will happen)

or

2. the fact that he can�t vent on me will cause his irritation to escalate, until he feels the need to �discuss� his displeasure with me.

�Discussing� his displeasure is a polite way of saying he tears a fucking strip off me. Letting me know that he thinks I am a complete incompetent because I can�t reach through the phone, answer it on the other end, rifle through someone's pockets and get him the money that is owed to him.

There is a third scenario. This one is totally in my head, you understand, because there are two chances that this might happen. Slim and none.

Dream Sequence:

�Hi, I just called to let you know that you are doing a great job and I appreciate all your efforts. Why don�t you take the rest of the week off?�

SNAP OUT OF IT!

File that one away with the �what to do when I win the lottery� fantasy.

I will do ya one better. If I win the lottery, I will pay someone to go to work and quit for me.

Please, no pity party.

Ok, I want to appoligize. I am sorry if some people may have gotten the impression that I need attention. The post about eating worms was not a pitiful attempt to get people to comment. (Although I enjoy it when people do.) I was bored, noticed there were no comments and just blogged the first thing that popped into my head. Well Jon got it in his head to comment on his site and the whole thing snowballed.

I hope you don't feel like you have to comment, most of the crap I write here is not worth it. But if something tickles you or makes you go "hmmm" then by all means comment.

But please, I can't host a pity party. I haven't got a thing to wear.

Decisions, decisions.

My car is inexplicably working great. This concerns me, because as soon as I tell one person, it will no doubt break down.

So I have decided to buy another car. There are two that I am looking at, both the same price, same year, but different kilometers on them.

Today I went and picked up the first car. A '97 Hyundai Accent. Red, four door, 80,000 km. It is a far cry from my New Yorker, very small in comparison. I feel like I am driving in a bubble. But I will drive it for a while and see if I can get used to it.

I will drive it for a few days and then pick up the other, a '97 Chevy Cavalier (red, four door with 160,000km) and drive it for the weekend.

At first glance the Accent looks good, mileage wise. But the Cavalier is sooooo pretty.

I guess the real question is:

Which one I will look better standing beside as the tow truck hooks up to it.

Think I'll go eat worms.

Ok, I'm starting to get a complex. No one is commenting anymore.

I was checking YACC's today and realized that I haven't had a comment in a while and that song started running through my head.

Nobody likes me,
Everybody hates me,
Think I'll go eat worms.

Isn't it funny how things from your childhood will pop into your head? I sang it to my son and he laughed like a nut. It seems we had a lot of crazy little songs when we were young, and the kids today don't.

Anyone have a favorite they want to share?

Hmmmm....ok...I am over it. Although I am sure worms are very high in protien, I think I will take a pass.

I walk. TO THE CAR! That's it!

The concert was a complete success. The aftermath however, sucked!

The warm up band for Dr. Hook was fabulous. I can't remember their name, they played Celtic Rock and really got the place going.

When Dr. Hook finally took the stage, I think people were shocked. Although I can't imagine why.

Dr. Hook was big in the early 70's so it stands to reason that they would be really old now. The lead singer Ray Sawyer came out on stage and the only way you would know it was him was the eyepatch. He had long white hair and a long white beard. The man is 65 this year.

But once he opened his mouth? Well let me just say, I am horse now from screaming and we were so close to the stage that my ears were ringing all day.

Now after the concert was a different story. We thought we would be smart and call a cab and walk one street over to meet it. Since there were so many people standing around outside waiting for a cab. Well I guess more people had the same idea. After waiting for over an hour, the "group" decides to walk to a friends house nearby and call again.

After about a block, I lose my mind and switch to bitch mode. I am NOT a walker. I walk to the car and that is it.

"Evel, it's just one more street over."
"Listen to me people. I am 37, I own a car, I have money......I DO NOT WALK."

I think they threw themselves in front of the next cab we saw, just to shut me up.

Works for me. ;-)

Here's your coat, what's your hurry.

If you don't watch BB3, you will have no idea what I am talking about, because you aparently don't get CBS under that rock where you been livin'.

Well Lori is out of the house, thankfully, before she completely lost her mind. Not exactly the most stable person.

I really want Marcellis to win BB3. For the simple fact that it would piss Josh off to no end.

Josh is a complete slime ball. I am just waiting for one of the girls to clock him the next time he grabs their ass. Not the Bimbo's (Tanya, Lisa, Chiara) mind you, they love anything that draws attention to themselves.

But I am pretty sure that before this game is over, Danielle will tear a strip off him.

Tanya is a bimbo big time, and she works it. She treats her (fake) tits like a separate entity. She is always adjusting them or just checking to make sure they are still there. And for some reason she is under the impression that if she were to strip off butt naked that it "wouldn't make the internet". The lights are on, but nobody's home.

Lisa is a pretty dim bulb. During Chiara's little "code" discussion, it took her about 15 minutes to "get it". And I am not entirely sure she actually did in the end.

And Chiara, what a classy broad. (NOT) She has made the most objectionable comments. Like when she said to Josh (a jewish man) "dumber than Jews in Germany in the 40's". But what can you expect from a girl who not only is cheating on her boyfriend, but proceeded to tell everyone on live feeds. (of course she was speaking in code, but unless you are a head in a jar, it wasn't hard to crack)

All in all there are enough people this year to hate, so it will make for very good tv.

On the cover of the rollin' stone.

I am starting to get excited. And I am probably dating myself here, but I we are getting geared up to go see Dr. Hook Friday night. I plan on getting shitfaced and making an ass of myself. Shouldn't be too hard.

I find that (in my old age) I am getting very nostalgic. I am collecting albums now, everything that I used to listen to when I was a kid. Bay City Rollers was the first album I got off of ebay. I was so excited when I got it in the mail. I had to buy one for my friend along with Shaun Cassidy, and Elvis.

I am also getting weird with my album selections, everything from Donny Osmond (old stuff) to Meatloaf. And I have become fascinated with 78 RPM records. Mostly big band and Broadway musical stuff from the 40's and 50's. My current collection is about 200 albums.

The most interesting thing about it is that I don't own a record player. My son says "You know you can download that stuff from the internet", but there is something about vinyl albums, the feel of them. You just can't get that from cd's or downloading from the internet.

I suppose I should get myself a record player, but it isn't the listening to the music so much as the look of the albums, and the memories they invoke.

I also bought a Dr. Hook album, I wonder if it is too corny to take it with me and get an autograph? Ya, your right....way too corny.

Thank you Saint Anthony for favors recieved.

H.

Cherry, snap snap snap snap, Danger, snap snap
(translation - CODE)

Something interesting happened on BB3 today.

Chiara, Lisa and Tanya were sitting outside and Chiara decides to create a way that they could communicate in code, so "we", meaning the internet people, could not understand what they were saying.

Oh my god...I can't believe how stupid this crayon is. First of all, "we" are all sitting at our computers watching her explain how the code works. The woman is brain dead.

Anyway, here's the interesting part. After trying for 15 minutes to explain the code to (airhead) Lisa, she procedes to tell a story.

Here it is: Aparently she has been cheating on her boyfriend for the last 3 months. The man she is dating is divorced with 2 boys and is a millionaire. She lied to her family so she could go to California to be with him while he was visiting his kids. (this is where BB tracked her down to tell her she was on the show) His name is Roger, and he divorced his wife (aparently) because she was bipolar. He has a house in the hamptons, and his family holds the lease on the WTC.

Ok, anyone with half a brain would have stopped before they got to the WTC thing, but this peice of work proceded to spell out his name.

Roger Silverstein, president of Silverstein Properties, son of Larry Silverstein.

Gee, Chiara, ya think he will be waiting for you when you get out? Not Fuckin' likely. I am sure you are fine fuck material, but don't pick out your china pattern just yet.

Great job, if you can get it.

A guy I kow recently returned from being out west for many years. �Out west� is where everyone from here goes to find steady union work. Most of them return sooner or later. This guy (we�ll call him Johnny, well, cuz that�s his name) rolled into town and went straight to the unemployment office to register. He filled out all the appropriate forms and waited to see a counselor.

Government workers just look busy, when in reality it just takes them a long time to get input from every worker on every floor on a question that eventually they figure out no one knows. So, after a long wait the counselor is going over his forms in which you give your first and second choice for employment placement. His first choice was Electrician. When the counselor saw his second choice, he paused:

�It looks like your second choice is��..Senator?�

�Yes, I dropped out of school to learn the electrical trade, been doing it for 30 years, I don�t know how to do anything else.�

Counselor grins, and begins to strike out the answer, �We can just leave that one blank.�

�NO! You asked for a second choice and the only other job I am qualified for is Senator. I was going to put MP but then I realized you had to be elected so I scratched it out.� He was serious.

He was flagged as a troublemaker so his claim was pushed through. One thing government workers hate more than giving you money is dealing with troublemakers. Especially those who make a valid point.

Blah! Blah! Blah!

I just need to say �God bless the person who came up with �blah blah blah��. And God bless the wind bags who have adopted it as standard practice.

I can remember the days when you had to listen to all the gory, boring details of someone�s story. It was usually someone who thought they were much more interesting than they actually were. You couldn�t possibly interrupt them because clearly they are enjoying the telling of the story. Because of their enthusiasm, you keep thinking it must be going to get better in the very next sentence. It doesn�t.

Meet that same person now:

�How you doing?�

�Got married, couple of kids, blah blah blah, divorced. How about you?�

What about those people who haven't� embraced blah blah blah or its old standby �yadda yadda yadda�? Fear not. We now have a weapon. Another ingenious invention, its called �Anyway!�

Stops them in their tracks.

Of course I, being a complete bitch, realize that I am losing precious BigBrother watching time, when forced to listen to some long winded tale. So I have made it standard practice to just give them �the hand� and say:

�Does this story have a point? I�m growing old over here.�

Luckily, I am not the kind of person who needs a lot of friends and the ones I do have understand that I have absolutely no patience.

An all time low.

I have just reached an all time low, for me anyway. I actually paid for something.

I tried for a few days to get the BB3 feeds for free, suckin' up to all the IRC overlords and a few of the underlings, and managed to get two days of free feeds. Not continuous feeds, mind you, but feeds none the less.

Tonight, I just couldn't take another second of it, and broke down and bought the feeds. Don't ask me how, lets just say, I got it done. Now I am legit.

AND I DON'T LIKE IT ONE BIT!

I never pay for software or anything, on principle mostly, not because I can't afford it. I figure if you can get it for free...why wouldn't you?

This is a difficult pill to swallow, I may need therapy after this.

Thursday, July 11, 2002...

False Alarm!

Ok, looks like I have to lurk every night on IRC for hours before one of those selfish people give me the code for the feeds. And some of them are very upset that people are getting them for free.

One impassioned plea came from a certain southern bell who will not be named because �.well frankly I can�t remember every moron I meet in IRC�..she writes:

�PLEASE people pay for the feeds, so we can be assured there will be a BB4�

OH PLEASE! I am totally into instant gratification. I don�t give a sweet flyin� flippin� fuck about preserving the legacy for generations to come. I don�t even recycle, even though it�s the law now. I could care less if the minute after I die, the whole planet goes up in smoke. I will be dead. Right now I am alive and I want to watch Big Brother!

I don�t see what the big deal is, its not like CBS is hurtin� for the money. If you can get it for free, more power to ya. And if you are one of the lucky ones (NOT ME!) who has a credit card (long story) then you should share your good fortune with those of us less fortunate. It doesn�t cost you any more than you are already paying, and you get so much more in return.

For one thing, people will be searching you out, being nice to you and hanging on your every word. ;-) or at the very least every keystroke. And think of the power (IRC folks get off on the power) you will wield over others. Deciding who views and who suffers. And if that don�t float your boat, how�s this?

"If you really loved me you would give it to me."

Hey, it worked for the guys, I thought I would give it a shot.

Thursday, July 11, 2002...

in the wee hours of the morning.


Huston, we have video.

Thank God....after lurking on IRC for a few hours I finally got live feeds for BigBrother 3.

For the next 3 months I will be no good for nothin'. Since BB3 is on the west coast and I am on the east, I will be up all night. I get addicted to these things.

Oh well I will be sure to surface every few days to blog.

And this is where I plan to spend at least one weekend of my summer.

nova scotia whale watching,whales dolphins seals in cape breton

Peddle your bullshit somewhere else, I ain't buying.

If one more person whines to me about what a hard life they have, I am going to explode.

Recently I entered (and was eventually banned from) a chatroom, where one person was whining about losing his girlfriend and not getting the promotion he deserved and how he didn't see any point in living any longer. The rest of the {{{{{hug}}}}} briggade was patting him on the head and cooing at him that all was not lost and please don't do anything drastic.

Well I lost it! I asked him if he had enough to eat, clothes on his back and a place to sleep. (Apparently he had a house with a pool and two cars and a very successful career in one of those computer companies.)

There are children who don't have enough to eat, who are being abused and neglected and he had the nerve to complain????? Oh please, peddle your bullshit somewhere else cuz I ain't buying. If you want to off yourself, go do it and put us all out of our misery. (this was the point where I was banned)

Look, I am sure people have problems, but first of all if this guy really wanted to off himself, he wouldn't be in a chat room telling everyone. He would just do it.

I am sorry, but when you are sitting in a big house with a pool, and pounding out your suicide note on a top of the line computer with DSL, while you sip 10 year old scotch out of the shoe of some supermodel, you should count your fuckin blessings and be thankful you aren't one of the many people in this world who have to watch their children slowly starve to death for want of a bowl of rice. Or a child who is tortured by a parent, or worse killed. I could go on and on but you all know what terrible things can go on in this world, just think about it for a second.

"I complained I had no shoes till I met a man who had no feet." A quote that more people should live by.

I am sure that someone out there will be offended by this post, but if you worried about everyone, you would never blog.

Buddy? Can ya hook me up, man?

Well, I am completely in a panic now. Big Brother 3 starts tomorrow night and I have yet to find the link for the free feeds.

Last year I found a site that gave you a program to hack the code to see the live feeds for free 24/7. Well I was addicted to it. And if anyone tells you it is not worth it, they didn't see the waterbed footage from BB2. When Will looked at Nichole and gave her a sheepish grin and proceded to piss himself....I thought I would lose my mind.

Anyway, if anyone knows where to get this (can't even remember what the program was called) I will do anything. And I mean anything. Wash your car, clean your house, give you my next born. Hell you can have my first born.

I feel like a junkie coming off some bad shit. Puleese!! people, ask around, whatever help you can give me......I am going into the DT's, and I don't think there is a 12 step program for this.

Don't anyone breathe.

Ok, I think I might just have a handle on this thing now.......I am backing slowly away from the keyboard.

Now...where the hell did I put those archives???

Well the obsessive compulsive thing comes in handy sometimes, I sat here all day (I broke for 20 minutes total to take my mom to church and pick her up) and finally got the new template up and running. And I am almost sure I haven't forgotten anything.

So? What do you thing?

Brain Fart

Ok, after that last post I do not blame any of you for thinking I am a complete and utter moron.

I have just (for the very first time) looked very closely at my blogger template. I now realize that it is just a basic webpage with the blogger tags inserted where the posts go.

What in the world was I thinking?

I knew this, I have been manipulating the HTML in this stupid template for months.

Sometimes I get too soft and lazy. Blogger is so easy, just pick a template and post your messages. Every so often throw in a script or two. I have spent the whole day searching the web for something that I already had.

I think I might need to get out more. But now I can't, I have to sit here and write code now that I have relieved my cranial gastritis.

I said it...but I didn't mean it.

Ok, I said that I was creative, what I meant was I have ingenuity.

If I don't have the right tools for the job, (which is pretty much all of the time) I get it done by rigging something up. Like MacGyver, remember him? Thwarts a nuclear meltdown with a wad of chewing gum and some bellybutton lint. Ok, so I am not that good, but you get the idea.

You can look at it closely and might still think it was done right, but you might never guess that that bookcase was made out of an old entertainment center and put together with a rock and a butter knife.

So I guess that isn't technically creative.

Today, as my ass formed a perfect plaster cast of my chair, I searched for a new blog template. You would think that with the growing popularity of blogging that there would be more sites dedicated to stealing borrowing obtaining decent and creative blog templates. Well, unless you like flowers or UUUGGGH Sailor Moon, you are shit out of luck.

I guess I will just have to use my OCD and learn how to make my own blog templates. Unless some real creative person wants to help me�(hint, hint).

There must be a book out on it by now. If it wasn�t for the stupid Lords Day Act, I would be able to start my obsession today. For Christ's sake, HE worked on Sunday, why can�t mall personnel? I am sure that given a choice people would rather work on Sunday, after all�.they can�t do anything, everything is closed.

Therein lies the catch-22.

And antother thing...

Ok, everyone is doing it, so I sat down and did it too.....not as easy as it looks.

100 things about me.

O� Canada.

Now that all the flag waving and fireworks are over on both sides of the border. I would like to jot down, for posterity, just a few of the reasons why I am glad I am a Canadian.

1. No one wants to blow us up.

2. Free health care.

3. The metric system.

4. Money�ok, its not worth as much but it�s pretty.

5. Clean air.

6. Clean water.

7. Gun laws�if you have one in public, you are a criminal�.there is no confusion.

8. Canadian beer�we dismiss anything under 6% as �for children and the elderly�.

9. No one gives a shit what the Prime Minister does. The closest he has ever come to an assassination is a pie in the face.

10. Americans have FBI, CIA, DEA, Secret Service�..we have RCMP (period)

11. Donairs.

12. Regulations that cap prices on prescription meds.

13. Americas Most Wanted.

14. Pizza with the cheese on top.

15. The Queen�she�s a great old broad, has her picture on the money but keeps her nose out of business.

16. Longest unprotected boarder, although I think we should tighten that up, �Captain, there�s a tidal wave coming up from the south, SHIELDS UP!�

17. Red Rose tea. �Only in Canada, you say.? Pity.�

18. Kids in the Hall.

19. When you win the lottery�.you get ALL the money.

20. Tim Horton�s Coffee.



UPDATE: Canada also has CSIS (Canadian Security and Intelligence Service) but it is so secret I never heard of it.

Too hot to fish!

Weather for Truro

28C - 62% humididty - wind 0 km/h

IT'S JUST TOO HOT TO BLOG!

I am going to go sit in the fridge.

Ciao!

ok....just had to add this.

It is so hot that when I took my hands off the keyboard, my arm had this stuff stuck to it......I realized that it was the varnish off my desk.

IT'S HOT DAMMIT!

Beam me up, Scottie! There is no intelligent life here.

Last night I watched a movie called Trekkies, not a movie so much as a documentary. All I can say is, you can love Star Trek, collect the action figures, go to the conventions. But when you dress up as a Klingon and refuse to speak English, please don't expect me to think of you as anything other than a complete nut bar.

Some of those people are completely off their nut. There was a dentist that has his office decked out like the Enterprise, with all the employees in uniform.

But the queen of all nut bars? A woman who was actually on the Whitewater jury, that wore her Starfleet uniform to court. I kid you not, she also sets up booths at the Star Trek conventions to recruit people into the Starfleet Alliance. (How the hell did this crayon get past jury selection?) Isn't that the 41st amendment? Right to be a space cadet?

God bless America, she's always good for a laugh.

HAPPY CANADA DAY!

Happy 135th Birthday Canada.

I AM CANADIAN!

I am also Nova Scotian

For you "non Canadains", Fast facts about Canada.

Here are 135 reasons it is great to be Canadian!

View from the Hill Cam, Parliament Hill in our nations capital.

The Great Canada Day Quiz.

Canadian Inventions.

Tour Canada without leaving your desk.

The Canadian Resource Page

You know you're Canadian when:
You stand in "line-ups" at the movie, not lines.
You eat chocolate bars instead of candy bars.
You drink pop, not soda.
You know what it means to be on pogey.
You know that a mickey and 2-4's mean "Party at the camp, eh!"
You know that Pike is a type of fish, not some part of a highway.
You know what a Robertson screwdriver is.
You have Canadian Tire money in your kitchen drawers.
You dismiss all beers under 6% as "for children and the elderly".
You wonder why there isn't a 5 dollar coin yet.
You know what a toque is.

Have a good one, eh?