Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Things that make ya go ..hmmm.

These are just some things that I was compelled to capture on my cell phone.

A one-and-a-half legged Seagull.

Pink hockey gear. Yeah!

This was hanging outside my brothers hospital room. I thought it was a little out of place.

So I got is a bug light. Gross!

Don't lie. We have all been drunk enough to use a toilet that looks just like this. Yes, I did.

No, this is not a golf course, it is the lawn of someones house. I kid you not.

And I don't understand the point of frozen grapes.

Monday, December 29, 2008

Canadian, eh?

I had to post this. I found it over at Rad's place and laughed through the whole thing. Okay, maybe act two is a bit dry, but the rest is worth listening to.

One woman was completely traumatized to learn that William Shatner was Canadian. Another is up in arms, saying that there should be a law against Peter Jennings, a Canadian, hosting a network news program.

You just have to listen to it, it is hilarious.

Americans are so self absorbed, they think anything good must be American.

All you Yanks can check out this website to crush your sense of superiority.

Americans think that you should be able to spot a Canadian a mile away. It's just geography guys.

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Like Budda!

The Sister bought me sheets for Christmas. I don't know any other way to describe them other than they are 'like budda'.

They say they are ultra-micro plush. You get into them and it just hugs you and you feel like you are in warm butter. You literally groan when you get into bed.

I work from home now, but I am trying to figure out how to work from bed.

Saturday, December 27, 2008

Like I said, talent runs in the family.

My cousin John's grandson, Ashton, is in this movie.

And my cousin Wayne is in this movie.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Santa was good to us.

And when I say 'Santa', I mean my sister. The Boy has been Jones'n for this guitar for a while. He had resigned himself to the fact that it would take him forever to afford it. So when my sister pulled it out from behind the couch....he was floored. At one point I thought he might topple her.

She has been bugging him to learn House of the Rising Sun since he first started playing at age eleven. Guess he won't be able to avoid it now.

Then I found out that my nephew is on YouTube. Talent runs in the family. His father used to play guitar and sing, back in the day. This is Gummmy playing an original composition.

Now all I have to do is convince The Boy that this is the way to go. Maybe I can hear him play more often.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Gets me every time.

When I was pregnant with the boy, some 18 years ago. I was watching Christmas specials and ran across this on on satellite.

The story in a nut shell. Kid owns a donkey he calls Small One. The donkey is getting old and not really pulling his weight. The boys father says he has to sell him.

Even though you totally see where this is going, considering it is a Christmas movie (Gee, do you think Joseph might buy him in the end), even knowing all that...this song made me bawl, like a baby.

And still does, every single time I hear it.

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

It's all in the presentation.

All ready to be devoured!

At least it is starting to look like Christmas.

Christmas Baking.


Cherry Balls (in white)

Cherry balls.

Headless mice.

And it looks like Martha Stewart had a fuckin' seizure.

Saturday, December 13, 2008


Annual wing night was a success. Gorged on hot wings and watched cheesy Christmas movies.

And the tree is up.

Friday, December 12, 2008

Dear Santa:

I have been a decent enough human being this year. If you are so inclined I could use the following,

Only slightly less pitiful than my birthday wish list.

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Breaking News! Oprah states obvious.

Oprah confesses, "I gained 40 pounds."

Well, duh!

You are on tv 5 days a week, did you think no one noticed?

Of course, no one would dare say a word. After all, you are Oprah, you could have them shot in the face. No one would ever find the body.

Just ask Hoffa.

Monday, December 8, 2008

2 hours of my life that I will never get back.

Actually watched Babylon AD yesterday.

I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and stop myself. It was worse than bad. I can't even tell you what the hell it was about, because I am not sure.

I think they may have ran out of money during production. Maybe that is why the bad guy just ... gave up looking for them in the end. I don't know.

Friday, December 5, 2008

I never felt more like an orphan.

We had some snow last week. Not much but a foot or so, wet and heavy. The kind that forms ice underneath. Well I was looking to order a pizza and knew that the delivery man would not come up the stairs unless they were cleared.

A dilemma, since I could not find my shovel. So out I go to clear the snow with just my feet and a hammer (for the inch of ice that is under it).

The pizza was not worth it. The next morning (around 4:30am) I am awakened by the call of nature. I roll over to get out of bed and the searing pain shoots up my spine.

I can't move, it is excruciating. I start to panic. I can't get out of bed and I don't have a phone nearby. What do I do? How long can I stay here before someone even notices that they haven't heard from me in a while? Work will call if I don't show up, but I still won't be able to get to the phone.

"I have to get out of this bed!"

After about half an hour I am finally in the bathroom. I do my business and am about to inch my way back to my bed, when it hits me. "What if I can't get out of bed the next time? What if I have to call an ambulance or something? I better take a shower while I am here." The whole 'clean underwear' thing your mamma warned you about.

An hour later I am fluffed and folded and back in bed with the cordless, the cell phone and my little laptop beside me. I have no real sense that I can recover from this injury since i have no drugs and I don't even have a hot water bottle to help ease the pain.

I look over and in the doorway are my two cats, Milo and Sammy.

They are just sitting there, side-by-side in the doorway, staring at me and I imagine the conversation between them.
MILO: "How long before you think we can start eating her face?"
SAMMY: "Dunno, lets just keep an eye on her."

At that point I start to really panic, I tried to call Nurse Darling, no answer. Bunnie has no car (it bought the farm the week before) The Boy is in school and my sister is 5 hours away in New Brunswick. I am completely alone in the world.

I am about to descend into complete despair when I think of something. I drag my laptop over and frantically email the only person I could think of, Tracey.

I cried like a baby when I saw her. She came to my rescue with a hot water bottle, some drugs and a hamburger. Because, well, everyone knows a Big Mac can cure cancer.

You really do find out who your friends are.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

One more encore and I call in S.W.A.T.

I live right next door to a high school. So I get to hear all the announcements (and, of course, O'Canada) over the PA system.

For some reason today, they are playing MMMBop by Hanson.

Over and over, on a continuous loop and all I could think of was...

hostage situation.

Monday, December 1, 2008

Friday, November 28, 2008

Why do dogs wag their tails no matter how many times you kick them?

The Boy got himself a job. He thought he would save up for something he really wants, an iPod Touch. Problem is, he told his father.

Since he has started this job, his father has given him nothing. It's not like he gave him much before that besides room and board, but now, nothing.

The point of getting a job as a teenager is so they can earn 'extra' money. Well, The Boy has no extra money. He had to purchase his own school clothes this year so anything that was saved went to that. He works at Wendy's. He might bring home $150 a week if he is lucky. You take your girlfriend out to a movie and pay for gas, that is pretty much gone. Add to that the fact that you are driving your father's big-ass gas-guzzler truck, you can forget about that second candy bar.

Honestly, I don't understand why he is still living there. I can't see what the draw is. He still needs to borrow my car if he wants to go anywhere besides to and from work. (mainly because he can't afford the gas in his fathers truck) I am still giving him money for school supplies and lunch.

It wouldn't be so bad, if he didn't have to constantly see his father throwing money at his 'other' son. That son goes to hockey school while mine has to buy his own stick and borrow a helmet.

And every time he does it, The Boy looks like a dog that has been kicked.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008


I got my first email comment on the column in Mr Barters, and it was a complaint.

When (lets call her) Madam Publisher called I think she was a little worried that I would be upset. Are you kidding me? I think its awesome. Someone actually took the time to email in a 'To whom it may concern'. I was stoked!

The reader wanted MP (and me I guess) to know how completely offended she was by the term 'like a fat kid on cake'. I kid you not. All I could think of was that if that offended her, she must have to shut down every sensory orifice she has in order to function in the 21st century. Forget TV and radio, she would have to cease to communicate in any meaningful way with anyone outside her small circle. You know, the people who are aware that 'fat kid' sends her off the deep end. If she only knew how much I 'clean it up' for print.

However, I applaud her right to say so, and welcome all comments good or bad. She went on to say that she was disappointed in my spelling and grammar skills and called the whole thing inane.

inane - silly and pointless

Sounds about right, it is an 'opinion' piece after all. I never pretended to be a Rhodes scholar but I guess I will have to add a disclaimer.

After reading it a second time (actually while framing it) I come to the realization that she most likely meant to say 'asinine'.

No worries, I get those mixed up too.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

How the tree-huggers are ruining it for the rest of us.

Tree-hugger is a general term I use for any politically correct, save the planet, yuppy/hippy types.. People who were middle of the road and after 4 out of 5 dentists agreed, they swung to the extreme right or left. There is no happy medium with them, they have no temperature control and they are basically Lemmings. I blame Oprah.

For instance:
- bullying in school - now there is a no tolerance policy, meaning your child can't even look at another sideways and he is expelled (meanwhile the bully still beats him up on the way home, bullies keep a low profile around the authorities)

- someone saw a hole in the ozone (It was not I) - now we have to recycle everything which has no impact really on the environment when you consider the extra plants they built to manufacture made-from-recycled goods and the extra 4 trucks they have on the road now to haul that shit around.

- some kid got sick and spread it to some other kid - parents started taking their kids to the doctor for any sniffle, loaded them up with antibiotics at every turn. Now kids immune systems can't handle being next to a peanut butter sandwich. Think about it, twenty years ago kids were not dying from looking at a peanut.

- a child was beaten to death by his parents - Now you can't even yell at them when they run into the street, lest you scar them for life. End result? Twelve year old murderers. No real consequence for bad behavior.

I know the points are simplistic, but every bad thing that has happened in the past 20 years can be traced back to the tree-huggers and their leader, Oprah.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

That is not how I roll.

This post at 'list of the day' got me thinking about what I would refuse to eat.

Bare in mind, I am a fat chick so the list is short. I can't say I agree with everything on Cary's will-not-eat list because unlike him I really don't over think food. Mostly because if it tastes really good, I would be extremely distressed to learn it was actually horse shit or bug barf.

I would still eat it...but I would be distressed.

However illogical that last statement makes this list. Here it is.

1. Milk. Ok, I don't actually never drink milk. However, I do it sparingly and I can count on one hand the number of times (besides cream in my coffee) that I have had milk (straight) in the past 10 years.

"Oh, milk is good for you." Who exactly decided this? You squeeze it out of the tits of cows, tits that are dangerously close to the part the shit comes out of. It's cow juice. If animal juice is so good for you, why not milk the cat? Cuz it's gross, that's why. Even though cats are way cleaner than cows. They only chose cows for the shear volume. There is no money in milking cats...the overhead would kill ya.

2. Head cheese. Dude, my father ate this stuff all the time. You don't have to taste it to know it is disgusting. I went with name recognition. I recognize that head cheese sounds gross. I refuse to go there.

3. Sushi - its raw fish. I shouldn't have to explain.

4. Oysters or mussels. Oysters I have never tried. I agree with Cary, they look like loogies. Mussels I have tried until I realized they look like vaginae, it's not how I roll. They were not tasty enough to cancel out the gross factor.

5. Tofu - I don't get it. I ain't eatin' it.

6. If I can recognize the location on the animal from which the meat has come from I will not eat it. Feet, ears, tails, tongue. YUCK!

7. Calamari - you can call it any fancy name you want, I ain't eating nothing with suckers. Scratch that, I am not eating anything that could potentially attack and eat or kill me.

8. If some rich person calls it a delicacy, forget it....not going there. Rich people are bored and most are idiots when it comes to culture. Show them a urinal nailed to a gallery wall and they will ooo and awe about the symbolism. (Dude, the symbolism is that the artist had to take a leak) But hey, if you can make money on the leftover shit that you can't sell to reasonable people (guts and eyeballs) then more power to ya, brother.

Weird or disgusting stuff I have eaten. (most when I was pregnant)
- peanut butter sandwiches dipped in chocolate pudding. (actually that was pretty good)
- peanut butter sandwiches with apple slices and/or bbq potato chips.
- pickled herring. It sounds weird, but it is really tasty. (Yes, I know its raw fish, I told you, there is no logic.)

What does your list look like?

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Woman's work?

This is the 21st century, what does that even mean anymore?

My sister is a welder, who is now a welding inspector. She went to school, she took the exams, she worked hard, got dirty and now she is an inspector. Before she learned to weld, she had been a hairdresser.

I remember when she was thinking about trade school, she wanted to go into carpentry because my father was a carpenter. This was way back in the day, women just weren't carpenters. She didn't really fight for the right because, well, my father so much as told her that even he wouldn't hire her. So she entered the cosmetology training. Hairdressing, after all , was 'woman's work'.

She was ahead of her time, I suppose, but I always secretly wished that she had just gone for it anyway. Stereotypes be damned! Even though she did do the hairdressing gig as a nine to five, she was still very handy with a saw and hammer. Over the years she did carpentry for herself and even built a house or two in her day. She wasn't your typical housewife, and did pretty much every 'man's job' around the house. She even drove a Harley. When the mill decided to hire women, it wasn't a surprise that she signed up to be a welder.

It has been over 10 years since she was been a hairdresser. So why do people still ask her to cut their hair? Not that she couldn't do it, but I wouldn't ask my Doctor to sling me a burger even though I know he did that in high school. I know why I do, cuz I am cheap. I really couldn't imagine why anyone besides her cheap siblings would even ask for a hair cut.

She has been working in New Brunswick recently and while she was home this last time, a guy she works with messaged me and asked if I would remind her to take her 'hair cutting stuff' (as he put it) back up with her. I don't know why, but this offended me. Scratch that...I do know why.

I told him, "Dude, if your interested in my sister, I wouldn't ask her to cut your hair. She is a welding inspector, not a hair dresser."

His response? "Right now, she's a welding inspector." Emphasis on 'now'.


I asked him what he did before the pipeline and of course he replied that he was always on the pipeline. However, I am sure that if after 10 years someone asked him to do some grunt-laborer work like fetch the boss a sandwich, he would be totally put out. So why does he have no problem asking the 'little lady' for a trim.

Who raises these people? How long before all these cave men die out and how do we stop them from perpetuating their neanderthal, knuckle scraping ways on their impressionable offspring?

We used to tell The Boy that his father was once a hairdresser until my sister taught him how to weld. The Boy never batted an eyelash, even though it was the other way around. It would never even occur to him that a woman couldn't do any job a man could.

That is the man I raised and that, my friend, is real woman's work.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Missing the shopping gene.

My sister gave me a substantial amount of money to get myself something for my birthday.

Cool, I though. It wasn't long before I realized how much I suck at it.

I didn't know what I really wanted for my birthday so I thought I would make a list.

When I showed it to Bunnie, she snickered.

She didn't say that I suck, but I knew she was thinking it.

As far as birthday wish lists go, I realize it is pretty pathetic. What is more pathetic? I came home 4 hours later with only a stew pot and ink. I am clearly out of control.

So, who's it gonna be?

Some may say McCain shot himself in the foot with Palin as a running mate, but does anyone even mention who Obama's running mate is?

Could you pick him out of a crowd?

I guess if Obama wins, everyone will have to play catch-up on that front.

The Birthday went well.

My friend came over with cake...

... and presents...

... and dinner.

Then over to the Undisclosed Customer Service Center™ to meet Bunnie for her break, and pick up this.

Jammies and what I think is a mouse. She spent top dollar trying to get it out of a vending machine.(I would have paid to watch that.)

And my sister, never to be outdone even when she couldn't be here. Deposited a ridiculous amount of money into my bank account. Honestly? I would have rather had her here instead.

I miss her.

Monday, November 3, 2008

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Did I miss something?

Yesterday was Halloween, wasn't it?

I did not see a single costume on an actual person, not even a kid.

All day long.

Thursday, October 30, 2008

How did I not know about this?

How to 'unshrink' your clothes.

How to make an Easter Egg Glow

How to Power a TV using a AAA battery

How to Create a High-Def speaker for under a buck.

You will wonder what you ever did before

Check out more helpful videos on their YouTube page.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Scraping the bottom of the barrel.

Neo-Nazis charged over Obama 'assassination plot'

I think if this is driving force in the neo-nazi movement, authorities should have the whole thing wrapped up by suppertime.
On the exterior of Cowart’s car were racially motivated words and symbols, including, on its hood, a swastika and the numbers “14” and “88”

Nothing like keeping a low profile.

Sunday, October 26, 2008

Decisions, decisions.

My cat Milo is the kind of cat that will annoy the shit out of you if you let it. He has a real problem. Every single time the door is opened, he has to go through it. He can never decide if he wants to be in or out.

It doesn't matter that he just came in, if you open the door again, he is compelled to go out. You can stand at the door for an hour opening and closing it, he will go through it every time. There is no rhyme or reason to it. You just learn to not open the door unless you want him in or out. Leaving the decision to him will drive you bat shit.

So today I am heading to the bathroom and of course Milo gets up and as soon as I reach the door, he is standing there ready to go out. I open the door as a reflex. As I get half way through the kitchen I hear this weird sound, like air leaving a tire, only it sounds sort of (I don't know)...harsher? Very strange.

Then it registers that I never actually heard the door close completely. As I turn back towards the door the hissing is louder. I reach for the door handle and there it is, Milo's tail on the inside of the door, minus Milo.

Perhaps this will force him to make better decisions in the future. Like, when the door opens...haul ass.

Friday, October 24, 2008

Kill them with kindness culture.

For the past week or so, the people downstairs have been taking to playing their music extremely loud, very early in the morning. I am talking before eight in the morning. One morning I took a hammer to the floor. Hint not taken.

Now I can pretty much sleep through anything, we live beside a school so I am used to the buses and large trucks. But the one thing I can't sleep through is the loud base line of a pop song. Since it is the only thing you can hear.


So this morning, I put my speakers and sub woofer next to the heating vent and turned the speakers up as loud as they would go and set this on a loop.

Along with a few other Italian tenors.

Fuck yeah! I might just leave the house and forget to turn it off.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Saturday, October 18, 2008

What a wonderful world.

Did you know, that you can buy 'half' a pie?

I was at the grocery store, in the mood for some pie but not able to decide between pecan and blueberry.

What was I to do? I couldn't eat two whole pies, some would go bad....even I can't stand that much pie. But when I was about to say the hell with any pie at all I see this wondrous site.


I buy half a pecan and half a blueberry pie. I am also informed that you can buy quarter-cakes. So you can have 4 different kinds of cake in one cake.

What a wonderful world we live in. (I need to get out more)

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Road Retarded.

Why can't men grasp the concept of the four-way stop?

We had a power outage and people lost their minds. I mean, really. Ok, so 5 minutes ago there were traffic lights and now they are dark. Whatever will you do?

Duh. You treat it like a four-way stop. Simple, right?

You would think, but no. You always get that one idiot that has to play traffic cop. Things are going smoothly, people taking turns, one after another clockwise. Til you get to this idiot who decides he is going to 'let you go' ahead of him. He is sitting there waving me on.

If I go, then he will go after me, which will effectively make everyone think that we are switching the whole direction of the four-way stop. I sit there hoping he will get the message and just take his turn, but no. He flashes his lights for me to go.

That is when I lose it, I start screaming at him, "Holy Fuck! Just fucking go! It's your turn and you will just fuck the rest of these idiots up."

He gives me the finger like he is hurting my feelings. I don't give a shit if he moons me, as long as he moves his ass along.

And here I was, thinking I was going to drive around wasting time til the power came back on. After that, I had to get off the road before I hurt someone.

Sunday, October 5, 2008

Keep your stick on the ice.

Getting ready for hockey season.

And no highlight reel would be complete without our boy, Sydney. The 'next' one.

* Pittsburgh Penguins' franchise record for assists in a season by a rookie (63)
* Pittsburgh Penguins' franchise record for points in a season by a rookie (102)
* First rookie to record 100 points and 100 penalty minutes in a season
* Youngest player in NHL history to record 100 points in a season
* Youngest player in NHL history to record 200 career points (19 years and 207 days)
* Youngest player in NHL history to have 2 consecutive 100 point seasons.
* Youngest player to be voted to the NHL All-Star Game
* Youngest player in NHL history to win the Art Ross Trophy
* Youngest player in NHL history to win the Lester B. Pearson Award
* Youngest player in NHL history to be named to the First All-Star Team
* Youngest player in NHL history to be named a full team captain (In January 1984, Brian Bellows of the Minnesota North Stars was made interim captain at 5 months younger than Crosby, but he only served the latter half of the 1983-84 season replacing injured captain Craig Hartsburg)

Let's add Joey MacDonald. Another local boy. (I actually video taped his wedding for him way back when.)

Colin White,

and Jon Sim, both from New Glasgow, NS.

Let's just say, we have seen the Stanley Cup, up close and personal, more than once around here.

Friday, October 3, 2008

Gee, I really hope they crack the case.

In the news today...
"The death of a mainland moose near Pictou on Thursday, Oct. 2, is being investigated by the Department of Natural Resources."

Big news around here. Thankfully we have a crack team of investigators.
"Department officials that spoke to media Thursday were not aware that the moose had fallen from the sling as the helicopter took off. The moose may have been ill, and may have died from a combination of stress, the tranquilizer, and the fall."

Ah, I am no Gil Grissom, but I think you can safely say that falling from a helicopter is the probable cause of death.

Thursday, October 2, 2008

Will he 'end up' like me?

SUBTITLE: Another crayon conversation with TBF.

The Boys father called me this morning at 7:30am. He has been calling a lot lately. Where is The Boy? Did he go to school, was he really at work? What is he doing with all his money? He lives with you, why don't you fuckin' ask him?

I know the boy has been trying to save up for an iPod Touch. But was foiled recently when he had to use that money to buy hockey gear. (Gear his father should have paid for, but was conveniently out of town and unable to purchase.)The Boy was defeated.

I had to giggle at the 'all his money' question. He works at Wendy's he might make $150 a week, if he is lucky. And since getting the job his father won't even give him 5 bucks for his ice time for hockey. 'All his money' is what he is living on.

So this morning, he finds a business card from the Cash Store (payday loans) on the bathroom floor. He calls me and goes ballistic, "If I catch him at that place I will rip his head off. "

"What the hell are you on about?" I didn't hear much of his ramblings, except for the last part.

"I don't want him to end up like you!" And then of course he hangs up. One of the many reasons we are no longer together, he doesn't fight. He is more of a hit and run kinda asshole.

I am not completely sure what he meant by that, or how he imagines I ended up.

Luckily we live in the 21st century so I get out my mobile phone. And text him.
End up like me? Just remember that YOU are the common denominator in this scenario, Asshole!

No reply.

As long as he doesn't meet some asshole and have to try and figure out how to raise a child ALL BY HIMSELF, he should be fine.

Still nothing

And what exactly are you doing about it? Except treating him the same way you treated me? We'll be lucky if he doesn't turn out like you.

The man is lucky he was not standing in front of me, I would have dropped him like a rock.

Turns out The Boy needed something to write a confirmation code on, he had ordered a meal at Swiss Chalet. TBF will be disappointed that there was no cloak or daggers involved. Sometimes I wonder what I ever saw in him. Wait, now I remember, it was the car.

They say it takes a village? Well my sister is the Queen of that village. She heard about the boy having to spend his money on hockey gear and promptly ordered an iPod touch for The Boy. It will be here in a few days. She wanted to have it engraved 'Because your father is a prick' but I went with 'Love Aunt Adah'. I think the prick thing is implied.

TBF wouldn't even think of lifting a finger for anyone, ever. Unless, of course, there was something in it for him.

That is the difference in the gene pool between our family and TBF's. I am sorry I ever swam in the shallow end of his.

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

What happened to customer service?

I walked into a local store at the beginning of the summer to get a cell phone. I was looking on the shelf and wasn't finding what I was looking for. Fortunately a nice (very) young man was on me in seconds, "Can I help you find something?"

"Yes, there is a phone on the website, fifty bucks."

He walks over to the counter where the other 5 very young employees are, there is a short exchange and he comes back, "All we have is on the shelf."

Really? This is a huge chain, they couldn't possibly have all the merchandise on the shelf. He thinks he is dismissed and turns to walk back, I follow him.

"Nothing out back then?" They all look at me with blank stares. Another of them repeats the line, "All we have is on the shelf."

"You are seriously telling me that there is nothing out back but empty shelves. Did you get robbed? Shouldn't we notify the authorities?"
They are not getting the hint.

"Okay, let me spell this out. I want you to check."

More blank stares, they are still not moving and I am getting irritated. "Ah, one of you is going back there, decide amongst yourselves who that will be." Then I turned my back on them and leaned on the counter, waiting.

I leave with a new cell phone

After that fiasco, I go to the local burger joint to get lunch. I get to the speaker and give my order, "What? I can't hear you." No, sorry, no nothing. I repeat my order.

"What? I can't hear you, drive up." Are you kidding me? However, I am committed now. I am in the lineup, cars in front and behind me. Nothing to do but drive up.

I get to the window and turn my head to order and am literally startled by what I see. The 'girl' sticks her head out the window so she can hear me. She has piercings all over her face. Two in her bottom lip, one through her nose and another (I believe) through her eyebrow. No wonder she couldn't hear me, she was probably getting feedback from all that metal. Am I supposed to find this appetizing?

I remember that just a few years ago, if you had a piercing you not only had to remove it but some places would make you put a band aid over the hole in your head. A practice I whole-heartedly support. You don't want their brains to seep out, do you?

I applaud student employment in the summer, but do you have to go lax on the dress code and the customer service training? I realize they won’t be there long, but don’t you want us (the consumers) to return when the summer is over?

The establishments who employ teenagers that have metal protruding out of their heads know that customer service, or lack there of, will not stop you from patronizing their establishments.

Mama and Papa need their fix.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Hidden Treasure.

Since I had two days off I was attempting to get the rest of my record collection entered into my handy-dandy database program.

I was about to leave it for the night when I ran accross this. It took me a minute to figure it out, it was such a strange name.

Then I read it backwards.

Eivets Rednow (prominently featuring "Alfie" by Burt Bacharach and Hal David) is a 1968 instrumental album released by Stevie Wonder under the pseudonym Eivets Rednow on the Gordy (Motown) label.

The album was released almost in secret. Because of Motown establishing Wonder as a soul-pop shouter, the label agreed to release the album with Wonder's name backwards. This would be copied by other musicians over the years. Wonder only plays harmonica, drums, and clavinet on this album and doesn't sing on any of the tracks. "How do you spell Stevie Wonder backwards" is printed on the top corner of the album sleeve in small print, serving as a hint to the record buyer.

Mine doesn't have the original sleeve but it is in decent condition.

I wonder what it's worth.

Another interesting one I found was Neville Willoughby. He was the voice of Jamaica, a broadcaster most famous for his early interview with Bob Marley.

Weird what you learn when you dig up old dusty boxes.

YOU ARE HERE - SEPT 23, 2008

How people found this site. And the ranking. (if I can locate it).

- hockey night in canada theme scott decoste (Hailfax) (#1) Number 1 and 2 on this one.
- peter mackay (Province of Canada) (#1) Hmmm, interesting.
- it's not just the weather that's cooler in canada by samantha bennett anaylsis (Toronto) (#2)
- i haven't had my coffee yet, don't make me kill you. picture (Houston) (#8)
- dead guy reel (Kentucky) (#2) Just....eeeww.
- pfo letter (Alberta) (#?) Got plenty of those in my time. All from Convergys.
- throat closing up smell (Virginia) (#?)
- weston model 703 (Seattle) (#3) Yes, I have one.
- who shit in your cornflakes? (Toronto) (#1) One of my favorite sayings.
- porn sites loincloths (Virginia) (#1) To each his own, I guess.
- spazolas (Norway) (#4)Guilty.

HERE FROM WORK or SCHOOL? Shouldn't you be working or studying?

Goldman Sachs Company(New Jersey)
State University Of New York At Buffalo (NY)
Province Of Nova Scotia (Halifax)I think Peter is Googling himself again.
Canadian Department Of Education (Halifax) Hi Dave.
Weber State University (Utah)
U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission (Houston)
Corporate Express (Colorado)
Magellan behavioral health (Missouri)
Hanes Companies Inc (North Carolina)
Hard Rock Cafe (Florida)
Laguardia Community College (Brooklyn, NY)
Vanderbilt University (Tennessee)
University Of Pennsylvania (Philadelphia)
The Calgary Sun (Alberta)
American Forces Information Service (Virginia)

Can You See Your House From Here?

HINT: Ever lose your golf balls in McCall lake? Or have a drink at the Toad & Turtle?

Well, can you see your house from here? If you can, email me.