Remember me.

It's a crazy thing when people die, everyone says such nice things about them. Even the really big loser/asshole/psychopath/pedophiles of this world. I keep thinking, did this person, spouting poetry about the dearly departed, ever actually MEET them? Or did they just forget how much of a maggot the person was?

All of a sudden they go at it like its a real estate or personal ad.

"He was a quiet sensitive soul" DUDE! He was a pedophile. And if you believe in God, no he is not looking 'down' on us all he is most definitely peering up our skirts.

"She was such a sharing person." Maybe over sharing...she told people at the bar that her kids were dead when, in fact, she had just left them home alone. I am sure she got more than a few free drinks out of that.

"He was a pillar of the community." Maybe of the Arian Brotherhood Community.

"She put her heart and soul into everything she did." OMG....look up 'sociopath' in the dictionary...you will find her picture. She had the attributes of a cult leader. She manipulated 3 people into offing themselves just so she could host the candle light vigils and gofundme campaigns to help with funeral expenses.

I am sure everyone knows that one person that, upon their death, would be like me. Attending the wake armed with a hat pin so I can drive it into their temple (on the guise of kissing them goodbye) to make damned sure they are actually dead from one of the many terminal illnesses they NEVER had.

For the love of all things holy. When I die, please do not forget that I could be a complete asshole at times and I probably won't get wings on the first day. Me and Clarence will be fighting for the record.

What's on your mind? FUCK OFF, ZUCKERBERG!

No, it is NOT life changing!

No, it is NOT brilliant. It will NOT leave you speechless. 

No, it is NOT unbelievable, awe inspiring or genius.

That song was NOT actually written about you.

NOTHING will change the way I feel about brushing my teeth.

If you don't know the origin of your last name by now, you have been living under a rock or you are twelve.

No, it will most likely NOT bring you to tears. And YES you can most certainly believe your eyes.

What this animal does is NOT mind boggling.

What that kid did is NOT going to change the world. He stuck his face in a birthday cake. That does not make him a phenom. 

God does NOT creep Facebook to make sure you are liking and sharing something. It is just not how he rolls.

That cat is NOT a hero for waking you when there was a fire. Had you installed a cat door he would have left you there with not so much as a by-your-leave, and would be watching the bitch burn from the safety of the side walk.

What your dog does when you get home from an extended absence is NOT jaw dropping. He wagged his tail. He does that when you come back from checking the mail or taking a dump.

You don't need to share or like a meme to prove you are NOT in favor of rape,  pedophilia or animal cruelty. I will NOT share it, I do NOT negotiate with terrorists or extortionists. 

You don't have to share and like if you love your children. Try just telling them face to face for fuck sake. Facebook has become one giant chain letter when its not the worlds most read obit page.

What kind of fabric are you? What color dragon are you? What kind of sandwich are you? Bitch, seriously? You are human, get back on the meds.

Even if, by some stretch of the imagination, you actually did have a previous life? I can guarantee that FaceBook was in no way privy to it.

What does your underwear say about you? Nothing, its fuckin' underwear. If you think yours is dissing you behind your back you have bigger problems. Medicate.

Your zodiac sign does NOT determine whether you become an asshole or not. Oh sure, you and approximately 700 million people on the planet born in that month span are having the exact same fuckin' day as you are. Seems totally legit.

Quit whining about getting game requests. If you spent a fraction of the time you waste bitching about game requests and learned how to use Facebook, we would all be better off. I have thousands of 'friends' and get zero game requests. Why? BECAUSE I LEARNED HOW TO USE FACEBOOK!

I get it if you are fat fingered like me trying to use the teeny tiny phone keyboard. However, if you are using a full sized keyboard, there is no excuse for typing ' r u thr?' And stop bitching about grammar Nazis, just stop. How about you stop contributing to the dumbing down of an entire generation who will never even learn to sign their own name?

And another thing... for the love of God and all things holy....resist the urge to blindly share every fucking post you see. 

Betty White is NOT dead. The Germans did NOT just invaded Poland. For fuck sake, get the fuck off facebook, wander into CNN every once in a while or at the very least, pick up a fuckin' book!

My name is Eva....and I am an addict.

My drug of no choice? FaceCrack.
I want to say it is long hours of sharing meaningful shit with real friends and keeping up to date with how my family is doing. But like a crack whore....I would be lying.

When I am not farming or blazing the pioneer trails, I am keeping up with what is going on in the vaping community. God forbid a mod should come out and I not be aware of it til the next day.

Them's fightin' words.

Since I last posted here a lot has gone on. I am doing a vaping show (again) only on another network. I think I finally found a co-host that won't try and have me killed. She is a pretty good mix of knowledge and humour. And most importantly, a thick skin.


Please do come and check us out if you care at all about what I am doing? Or if you are interested in getting off the cigarettes. It has been over a year and a half since I accidently quit smoking using electronic cigarettes. (Click on the show logo and it will take you there.)

I have to tell you that when I am not snorting facecrack, I am lurking on GPTV. Before becoming a host, I got more free shit from watching vaping shows than anything else. Its fun and informative. And they don't care what comes out of my mouth.

No matter how politically incorrect it is. I think I will stick around a while.

Too much?

Thought I would see if my brother Dave was ready to add me back to his facebook. After all, who disowns their own sister?


You think he'll respond?

Memory Lane

How far down that road do you really want to go?

Facebook is a wonderful thing. Reconnecting with people you haven't seen or heard from in years. Catching up with those people can bring back a flood of memories. The good and the not so good.

Recently I reconnected with one of those people who, I just found out, recently lost her mother. Which, of course, immediately made me think of my father, who died in 1989.

I was compelled to express to her that it would all eventually get better, and I believe it will.

Looking at a picture of my dad can still make me cry. It doesn't rip my heart out like it used to but it still effects me.

Knock it off, or I will knock it down!

The odd, well timed, inspirational, bring awareness to a problem video is all well and good.

Just keep it off my FunWall please.

I open my Facebook and prepare to smile. What embarrassing pictures did Potsie post from his weekend at the Moose & Squirrel? Who's having a birthday, gotta post some silly animated birthday card. How many old farts from high school can I track down today. HA, someone sent me a friendship turd. This is a happy place, right?

Holy Shit! 16 dead kid videos on my FunWall? WTF? When I see those videos I get enraged, I want to hunt down the asshole who hurt those children and have them sand blasted or skinned alive. Right after I find the asshole who posted this on my FunWall and punch them in the throat!

It's called a FunWall people. Not a 'depress the shit out of everyone you know wall', the name was a little wordy so they went with FUN! Ya, you cringed at the 'dead kid' reference. "Not very sensitive or PC of you Evel." But that is exactly what I mean. I sound insensitive because they have desensitized me.

It seems there are some people who do nothing but sit and watch 'dead kid' videos and post them on everyone else's wall. How fucking depressing is that?

I am not saying don't try and bring awareness to child abuse or drunk driving but there is a time and a place for everything. I am trying to cram a little fuckin' joy into my otherwise shitty life, "You're bringing me down, Man!"

Keep that shit off my FunWall......
or I swear to God I will tear that mo'fo' down!

Face Crack.

The dude actually did it. Turn out was good and the Frisco stayed till the tattoo was finished and beyond, I think. This is the artwork that they settled on. Much better than the mug shot.

Below is some video of the event, I am sure there will be plenty more where that came from, he won't be able to forget this little stunt any time soon.

If you enjoy it, thank your cult leader.

So what if the Bro deletes me from his FaceBook, I am a member of this group.



The count is now at 15,578 members. This boy is getting inked! And soon.