A little gift to myself for my Vape'iversary!

Deep Thoughts.

I don’t know what’s better about e-cigs – not getting cancer or annoying non-smokers by not getting cancer.

Not exactly a criminal mastermind.

So, we got 'robbed' at the shop. Just thinking about it, I am shaking my head.

Dude comes into the shop and says he ordered a battery online from one of our friends in Saskatchewan, Mitch. Okay, we know the guy well. This guy says the battery is dead and Mitch directed him to us. 

I figured, I would take the battery back and have Mitch just send me a bat when he sends me my next order of juice. Unfortunately, I am out of batteries but they are expected within a few days. I tell him its not a problem, come back in a few days and I will fix him up.

The guy pokes around for a bit while I am texting back and forth with Mitch. He knows of who I speak and we make arrangements to make this dude happy.

So, Bunny is manning the til and she is ringing up a lady, after she leaves, dude leaves. As soon as he does, Bunny asks if I seen her blue setup. The lady immediately comes back and says that she waited for the dude to leave to come back to tell us that dude pocketed Bunny's setup.

Bunny is ready to string the guy up and chases after him. He is long gone. I just chuckle and text Mitch that his little friend lifted some merchandise. He chuckles and sends me the dude's name and address.

Bunny is flipping out and I am still just chuckling, looking at all the expensive things he could have taken, he lands on a $12 battery that is about a year old.

We call the police and give them his name and address. We don't want to press charges, just want him served with a protection order, so he will never return.

But Bunny has other plans. She too has his name and address.

He went out one night for smokes and never came back.

Okay, so not for smokes, but Norman went out one night and never came back. Its been about a month now so I am pretty sure he is not coming back. He might...but there has been two blizzards since he left so I really don't hold out much hope.

That being said, I guess I miss him. Maybe not him personally but I have decided that I need something else in the house with a heart beat.

Something else 'alive' in the house.

I thought about an iguana but someone said they get five feet long or something crazy. This is a trailer, not gonna play. 

Then I thought of a chameleon. Interesting, found this pic even and was making plans to get it. I was convinced and I planned to call him Fluffy. Then I investigated the care and feeding of the chameleon...gross and gross. Basically said I would be living with live bugs........on purpose. Not happening.

So, cat it is. Put out feelers, and on of my FB friends said she had kittens. So I said, 'Ya, whatever, bring it.'

Then she says she has two left, one boy, one girl. Then she ends it with "they are brother and sister".

WELL FUCK! Brother and sister? Really? "Just bring them both."

Really? You can't just show up at an orphanage and take the brother and leave the sister behind. I guess they can be company for each other when I am not around which is a lot of the time.

The life of Riley.

After moving from the 'cave' ... a long story, I moved into a trailor owned by my oldest best friend, Kimmy.

I really am living the life of Riley but before I give you the particulars I just need to say, "Don't hate the playah."

I pay less rent than the cave, I have no neighbors above or below me. It is peaceful.

And...that is just the least of it. Kimmy (my landlady) is not only my best friend but she is also my housekeeper, laundress, chef and valet. She cleans my house, does my dishes, does my laundry, cooks me dinner and even starts my car in the morning and cleans off the snow.

I get free internet and when I told her I didn't want cable (I download my tv shows for free) so wasn't going to get a phone, she brought one of her cordless phones over. I kid you not.

Will I ever move?

Sure....kicking and screaming.

It amazes me still why I never married that man.

So, TBF won the lottery. I know, you are saying "There is no God." So you think maybe he spread the wealth to his son? Not a freakin' chance.

The Boys coworkers from TBF's shop looked upon him in pity and said, "Dude, too bad yer mom didn't win." Even they knew he wouldn't see a dime.

So today the boy is 23. I could not be more proud of him and took him yesterday to buy new work clothes and boots. TBF says to him, "New gear? What's the occasion?"  Mind like a steel trap, that one.

Quick thinker that he is, he sends his daughter to MacDonalds to pick up lunch and as a birthday honor, he allows The Boy first pick from the assortment of cookies. 

The man is generous to a fault.

UPDATE: New Information: Turns out the daughter bought lunch, TBF didn't even pay for the cookies. Pitiful.

Decisions, decisions.

So, I got Norman fixed. Was it revenge or did I just want to prepare him for his inevitable existence as an outside cat without the wrath of the Landlady who has female cats? Revenge. Totally.

I wake up at 3am and Norman is on my shoulder staring down at me with his eyes wide and his ears back. I know he wants me dead. He just hasn't figured out how to accomplish that and still get fed.

He wants me dead.

Was suckered into taking yet another cat into my home. I just got rid of a dog, but this cat had a sad story and it was living in someones basement. I had just moved to the country so I figured I would take it, turn it into and outside cat (I don't believe any animal should be allowed to shit IN your home) and if it ran away? It was God's will.

So I get this cat. Its a Russian Blue...pretty and it appeared to be quite lovable. His name was Mandu. (Get it?)

I get it home and it is one of those 'never leave you alone' cats. Rubbing up against your leg, mewing sweetly and generally making a nuisance of himself. I am sitting at the desk, surfing the net and Mandu is exploring. He finds his way under the desk and is rubbing against my leg which is my queue to reach down and pet him, right?

So I reach down and am petting him when all of a sudden he chomps down on my hand. I scream but he does not let go, he has a death grip on my hand. I look down and he is looking at me with crazy eyes, his ears flattened to his head. 

WTF, DUDE?

I have to literally kick him (which is not an easy task for a fat chick) to get him to let go. He finally does and as I tend to my wounds, he is sitting in the corner, growling at me.

This is when I rename him Norman. (fucking psycho)

Ya Ya Ya...I know.

I know I have said this a lot over the last few years. But seriously I do intend to blog more. So much has happened over the last few years since I quit smoking and started vaping. I thought I could catch up but it looks like I will just have to carry on from here.

I have moved again....the previous pictures of the apartment that didn't work out. Well it would have worked out if the landlady had not (after only 5 months) started talking about raising the rent, substantially. I could see where this was going and I think I was already paying too much rent for what I had. Anyway....onward. Moved back out to the place where I grew up. In a trailor, all by my lonesome.

Opened a vape shop in town. Doing well. Film at eleven.

Close but no cigar, yet.

So I had to drag all my work shit over to the new apartment. The unfinished apartment, I might add. But at least they have the bedroom done (sans floor) so I can work  in the morning. This should be fun.

This will be the first time in 5 years that I had to actually commute to work. I will have to actually put pants on and leave the house.

I believe by the end of the week I will be truly traumatized.

Walls going up!

Hi ho, Hi ho!

There was activity yesterday....actual activity! Supplies arrived, people showed up to work...

THERE WERE POWER TOOLS ON SITE!

THE SISTAH: I can't get on the internet.

ME: What does it say?

THE SISTAH: It says 'no'.

ME: Pretty sure it doesn't say 'no'.

Sorry....missed a couple days ;-)

Six of one?

So I am moving into the new apartment and the landlord, aka the Bride, says to me,"What are you doing Monday?"

Me, naturally suspicious,"Why?"

"Dad wants you to pick out the flooring and cabinets."

I can't decide whether that is a good or bad thing. Nice that he wants to let me pick what I like, but concerning that it isn't already underway.

So, since we have Sunday shopping here, I have pushed up the selection process to today.

Oh.....and welcome to DAY 3!

Don't piss on my leg and tell me its raining.

People, please stop telling me that a gun ban would not help anyone.

"Criminals will find a way to get guns..." Blah Blah Blah

Honestly? I am less worried about the so called criminals than I am about that fucked up 20 year old who, on the day he snaps, has easy access to guns obtained legally by his mother.

Here's a question. What the fuck does a kindergarten teacher need with a semi-automatic assault rifle? Suppose she could have used it for protection? Wait, what? That didn't work too well, now did it? She had 3 guns 'for protection' and was shot with one of them. By her son who, so far, is not reported to be one of these criminals you speak of.

Michael Moore said in an interview with Piers Morgan that more than 80% of gun murders on the planet happen in the United States. 

Maybe, just maybe, they need to rethink a constitutional amendment that was written before there was an organized military much less any kind of law enforcement. 

...another day (and my titles are screwed up)

This is how jumpy I am lately. Its 8am...on a Saturday...and I am awake. Maybe it is the mountain of reviews I have ahead of me? It will be a long day.

So, while I do that.....its DAY TWO.