Wednesday, September 1, 2004

You say 'bitch' like it's a bad thing?


You've all seen that bar at the top of our once immaculate blog templates. Ya, and there is no getting rid of it, I have tried. So, tonight I decided I should see if it is at least useful and started to randomly surf blogs.

I have realized one thing in the past hour. Most blogs are dead fucking boring! Now I could handle boring if at least they would refrain from slaughtering the Queen's English. Please people, there is a spell checker on the dashboard, use it! After you have mastered that, try a little thing called grammar and punctuation. Fascinating things.

Instead of whining that no one reads your blog, investigate the reason. And because, as you know, it's all about me. I give you.

Top Ten Reasons I Won't Read Your Blog:

10. People who try to be deep and artsy, put me to sleep.
9. Politics, I am Canadian, I don't do politics.
8. Donation buttons. Get a job.
7. Dark freaky background and white text. Nuf said.
6. Anime makes me physically ill.
5. Animated gif's make me sea sick.
4. Your You're boring. I don't care what you ate today, unless it got you admitted to emergency.
3. Most people like to take a breath every once in a while, so for God's sake, punctuate.
2. If your life is so bad, why not just change it and quit torturing the rest of us with your whine and cheese party.

And the number one reason I will not read your blog.....

1. U kant speel.

You say 'bitch' like it's a bad thing?

UPDATE


Guess I should be more clear, I am not looking for perfection. But some of the blogs were physically painful to read. Some of them went on forever with absolutely no punctuation, spell check or grammar of any kind. If you make it difficult to read, no one will read it.

It's that simple.

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