Tuesday, January 6, 2004

Apple's and Oranges

"Thank you for calling the Undisclosed Customer Service Center� my name is....blah blah blah..."

"Ya, I can't get my modem installed."

"What operating system are you running on that pc?"

"I don't' have a pc, I have an apple."

"Have you called apple, sir?"

"No, I need to get on the internet."

"Um, this is orange sir, we don't have people trained in apple."

He is very agitated now, "This has nothing to do with apple! I need to get on the internet and orange IS the fuckin' internet!"

Really? Hey, I think this guy must owe us money then. I wonder if Bill is aware that he owns the internet? Maybe we can get some of these dipshits kicked off? I will have to look into that. There has got to be some perks to working for "orange".

"Um, no sir, we are not the internet. And we don't have anyone here trained in the use of apple, you will have to call them."

"Oh, I see what this is, you are trying to get me to pay for it. You people at "orange", always in it for the money."

"Actually, sir, I couldn't even charge you for support, you have called orange, and your product is apple. We can't help you."

"Well, that's just great, my brother-in-law told me that you people have taken control of my computer, and that is why I can't get on the internet. I tell you what, I will never buy another orange product for as long as I live."

As far as I can tell he hasn't bought one yet, so I think its safe to say that Bill's kids can still go to college. He is ranting in the background but I have tuned him out. Oh, shit....he is giving the wife the phone.


"Yes, mamme, I was just telling your husband that here at "orange" we have no one here that can help him with his apple."

"Dis eez owange?"
She starts screaming at her husband in some language and even though I don't speak it, I get the gist of it. "So sawwy."

"Not a problem."
Your the one who married him, I am deeply sawwy for you.

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