Thursday, March 5, 2015

Spider Racism.

I have discovered I am a spider racist.

I used to say, "I hate spiders!" Period.

But, I realize I don't hate all spiders. Just those asshole homeless spiders.

So, you got a spider up in the corner of the room, he is on his little web, doing his thing, minding his own fuckin' business. I am totally okay with that. I even talk to him and get worried when he hasn't moved in a while. Right now for instance, I believe he is dead, but I don't plan on getting close enough to get his vitals.

That spider, I am fine with.  Unless, of course,
you check the web and he is gone. Then all bets are off! Stay in your own neighborhood, Brah, or I will pop a cap in your ass!

This spider, however, is an asshole and as such has been blasted with the first thing that I could grab. Shaving cream would have been better, but it was 3 inches farther away than the baby powder. He is lucky I don't own a rifle. I believe this one is dead as well, but again, not checking for vitals.

Who raises these spiders? Where do they come from and why are they not just content with building a web and raising their children right. Raising them to not be assholes who spring up from the drain to scare the living shit out of people.

Sneaky-assholes homeless spiders. I am against them. There, I said it. I am a spider racist...and I am okay with it.