Thursday, January 22, 2004

If it ain't sh*t, you must acquit.


Ok, here's the scenario. Three cats, mine, his and my mothers. If his cat makes a mess he has to clean it up, if it is one of the others, I have to. Simple enough, right? Ok, Mr. Cochrane, I may have found a loophole. I believe the actual wording of the contract stated that if it was one of my cats he didn't have to clean it up.

My mothers cat, Babe, and the boy's cat, Oscar are eating from the dish. I walk in. I hear a gagging sound and look over. Babe has chucked his lunch. (I can't describe the whole picture because it would spoil the ending). I grab the cat by the tail, and as I am throwing him over the railing, I yell to the boy, trying hard not to laugh.

ME: AH..BOY?
TheBoy: What?
ME: (I can't speak, I am in hysterics)
TB: What are you laughing at?
ME: Babe just got sick. (I completely lose it now.)
TB: (he starts to laugh also, which makes me laugh even harder) What are you laughing at, you have to clean it up. That's the deal.
ME: No, I believe the deal was, if it was one of my cats, you didn't have to clean it, there's a difference.
TB: So?
ME: So, I ain't cleaning this one.
TB: Well I ain't cleaning it.
ME: Oh, I think you are.
TB: Mom, we had a deal, you can't make me.
ME: Ah, here's the thing.(can hardly speak I am laughing so hard. I just had to pause for effect)Babe threw up.
TB: What? What are you laughing at? Babe is yours, you have to clean it up.
ME: Ya, Babe is my cat, but here's the thing, my cat threw up ( pause ) on your cat.

The boy turned green.

It was a thing of beauty, neatly done, all the way from his neck to his arse, not a drop on the floor, it was priceless and I almost pissed myself laughing.

Definitely a loophole you can drive a Mack truck through.

4 comments:

zorak163 said...

I didn't expect the surprise ending... one of my cats throws up all of the time - but never on the other cat. They fight enough as it is... that would probably start a fight akin to another world war.

Another Desert Rat said...

Oh, that is priceless! I love it! Just this morning, my cat chucked on the living room floor where, lucky for me, my husband stepped in it with his bare feet. Generally, the rule is you find it, you clean it. I believe he feigns blindness, but you can't really argue when it's squished up between the toes.

Enjoy the carnival!

Skittles said...

In our house it was whoever saw it first. Of course that led to a lot of looking at the ceilings. Happy Carnival!

Bond said...

Hi...I am walking down the midway at THE BESTEST BLOG CARNIVAL and enjoyed your attraction...OH MY