And another thing...

Hi, my name is "have you found shoes".

Ok...."the bride" is starting to get on my last nerve. For the last month or so she starts all her conversations with "Have you found a dress yet?"

Finally, I go and look and 15 min later I have an outfit, (which I bought more because she is obsessing about it than anything else) so now she is onto, "Have you found shoes?" I have half a mind to turn up at the church in black leather wearing a mourning veil over my head and bare feet. I understand she is stressing about this wedding...but we are not living in post war Germany, we actually have stores you can walk into and buy clothes.

Really?

Yes really!

Last night I am cruising sites like payless and sears looking for shoes. I don't really expect to find any online, I am more looking to see what the styles are now. ( I haven't worn heals since the last wedding) I mention it to her and before ya know it, she is calling and emailing stores with my measurements and having them check each store in the chain.

Obsessive compulsive much?

I let her go with it. I am not worried about finding shoes. I am wearing slacks so no one is going to be looking at my feet. And even if they were, who gives a sweet flying fuck!

I get home from work today and she messages me.

"Did you find shoes?"

"You mean since the last time you asked me, 12 hours ago?"

Holy Mother of God! I was working. I work everyday. When would I have time to find shoes? THEY ARE SHOES..........NOT THE HOLY GRAIL! I will find something to put on my feet. The wedding will NOT be ruined if I am wearing ugly shoes!!!! WHO CARES!

Ok, now I feel better. I have vented, I am ready to chat with "the bride" again.

Hey Riea! wuzzzzsup?

"Did you find shoes?"

Maybe I should change my name to "did you find shoes". She seems to prefer it to Evel.