And another thing...

Houston, we have tree!

And in case you are wondering, this is a Christmas Tree!

Let the festivities begin.

And another thing...

I have to tell you how impressed you should be that I even have a tree today.

Ready?

Good.

I decide that Tuesday, I will go out and get a tree. Get to the lot, only to discover that I cannot get the trunk of my car open. No matter what I do, it will not budge. So, I do what any self-respecting female with four brothers does. I call one. One with a truck.

He can't do it this day. So I tell him I will try again to get the trunk open and if I couldn't I would call him the next day. So, of course, I can't get the trunk open. Then of course it starts to snow. A lot of snow. Blowing and cold, ended up staying in on Wednesday, the brother was going nowhere.

My annual wing night with my friend, Tracey, is Thursday. We usually pig out on hot wings and watch cheesy Christmas movies. You can't get the full effect of a cheesy Christmas movie unless you are watching it a room decorated for Christmas, and that means tree.

That's it, I am woman, hear me roar. Out I go to conquer the car trunk. First I pull down the back seat and climb in from the inside. The boy is pulling the trunk release, while I decide what the hell is wrong with it. It is quite a site, me with my fat ass out the back seat. I frig with it for a while and the boy is shouting useless suggestions. Finally I snap, I pull the inside mechanism right off the trunk lock, cable and all, drive a screw driver into the trunk release and pop that sucker open.

I climb out of the trunk with a satisfied look for the boy.

"Great, now how you gonna close it again?"

"Don't bother me with minor details, Boy. I am going for a tree."

And off I go. When I get to the lot and pick out the tree. I realize that I can get one no higher than seven feet. I am not impressed, I usually get one that the Griswolds would be proud of, but my ceilings will not permit this year. The tree lot man is carrying it to the car and as he puts it into the trunk, SIDEWAYS, I realize I could have put the stupid thing in the back seat, saving my trunk mechanism.

But it was all for a good cause, and I admit I didn't think it through. When I got home I had to climb through the back seat again to tie the trunk shut. Hopefully I will not have to use the trunk again, till next year.