Ready to slit my wrists!
I took a call tonight that was so long and drawn out I couldn't post it word for word.
A woman called and wanted it "all off my computer" she just kept saying that over and over. It took me a while to figure out what the fuck she meant, since she didn't know either. I love it when they call us before their brain catches up to their mouth.
She bought a computer at a flea market, it was really old and didn't work very well. Wasn't sure what the hell she was telling me that for but her son bought her a new one. Well it was doing the same thing, it was asking her to accept the end user license agreeement and she didn't think that was right. She kept saying it wasn't legal.
"Mamme, you don't have to agree to anything. Noone is forcing you."
"But if I don't agree the software won't install."
"Exactly, I can give you the money back line and you can take it back."
"But I have to have windows on my computer."
"Exactly, so say yes to the end user license agreement."
"But I don't want to." This went back and forth for about 10 minutes.
She finally agrees, and we move on. Then she gets really wacky. She tells me that the Undisclosed Computer Software Company� is downloading stuff to her computer and she wants it off. Internet explorer was telling her there was a newer version, did she want to install. And she deffinately did not want to.
"So, uh, just say no?"
"Can I do that?" YES YOU FUCKING CRAYON! NOW GET OFF MY PHONE! But I was not so lucky. She was determined to have a problem that we must be responsible for. FUCK ME!
"The Undisclosed Computer Software Company� downloaded all this junk onto my computer and I want it off!" Ten minutes later I am still trying to figure out what the hell she is talking about, when she says, "All the stuff that was on my old computer is on this one, I want it off!"
Long, long, long, fucking agonizingly long story short. She believed that her old computer that she had taken to the dump was being accessed by us, and that we were moving all the stuff from that computer onto her new computer. I KID YOU NOT! And I can not get this turnip off my phone, I even consider asking her if she is off her meds. Finally her son gets on the phone and I explain to him that we can not access a computer that is in a dump, that would be magic and we don't do magic.
"So, you ain't gonna help us?"
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