Half a second after I hit SEND on the resignation letter, the Big Giant Head sends for me. "He wants to see you."
"Wow, that was fast. Has he read the email?"
"Don't think so , he has been standing over there the whole time." He indicates the rows of empty cubes.
As I approach him, my sister intercepts. She is carrying something. "Here's a pen for your new desk!"
"Hello? I haven't even told him yet."
The Big Giant Head raises and eyebrow, "Why am I always the last to know?"
"I don't know, read your email."
He tries to recover, "I actually knew this yesterday."
"Really? Cuz I only found out this morning."
"Maybe it was earlier today." He has his finger on the pulse.
Then he goes into his schpeil:
BGH: He spreads his arms wide, "How could you give all this up?"
ME: "You're kidding me, right?"
BGH: "But you are giving up all this tenure with ..."
ME: "Tenure isn't doing me any good." It really is the least beneficial in the grand scheme of things. Except that I know where all the bodies are buried.
BGH: "But its a smaller company..."
ME: "It's a Maritime company. It has been around since Jesus was a carpenter and it will be around long after I am gone."
BGH: "But you will be taking a pay cut."
ME: "Forty cents. And the Undisclosed Internet Service Provider™ awards raises by skillset. They train me for something new, I get a raise. If they did that here, I would be making more money than you."
ME: "Look, I have been trained and worked in every department in this joint. The way it stands here now, there are people who are trained for one job (customer service) who are, and will always be, making more money than me. The only thing I have not done is the ISP support, and if I am going to do that, I might as well be doing it in my bunny slippers."
BGH: "I see, well if you decide you can't stay for the full two weeks, let me know and there will be no negative repercussions."
ME: "Aside from the fact The Boy would starve? Thanks anyway, I will be here."