- The temperature does not drop 40 degrees when you cross the border. It's called the metric system, the whole world uses it. Besides the US, there are only 2 or 3 third world countries that are still on Imperial measure. Get with the program.
- Men who put their sunglasses on their heads. You can only pull that off if your gay. Ditto for flip flops.
- Stop assuming I eat lobster every day. Dude, those things are expensive and they don't just roam free in the parking lot.
- I have never even seen an igloo, let alone live in one. And the only dog sled I have ever seen was on TV.
- Metrosexuals: Pick a fuckin' team.
- It's called gun control, not oppression. If you see a guy with a pistol and he is not in uniform, he's a criminal. Simple.
- CSI: They are always walking around with little flashlights. Why don't they ever turn a fuckin' light on?
- No, Canadian is not the same as American. "Oh thank God you're American." "I am actually Canadian." "Same thing." Don't they teach you bigots geography?
- No I can't see what you are doing, its a fuckin' telephone, can you see me?
- Not all fat chicks are short, so why can't you make a pantleg for the rest of us. Shoulder pads don't fool anyone. I just look like a linebacker.
- If you want me to fix your computer, please note that "Its acting weird" is not enough information to go on. And if you start the conversation with 'once upon a time' I will beat myself to death with my keyboard.
- "The program has performed an illegal operation" does not mean the SWAT team is on its way.
- "How are you today?" Is a fuckin' rhetorical question. I do not give a flying fuck how you are.
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
Don't get me started.