Friday, April 14, 2006

Ugly Americans!


Since all the trouble in India, the Undisclosed Customer Service Center™ has been swamped with some people waiting half an hour on hold just to talk to a customer service agent.

Last night, the TM asked if we (the tech routers) would mind helping the CC agents close the queue. A simple enough thing to do, no cases, no transfers just let them know that we are now closed.

I sign in. 44 people on hold and 4 agents, counting me. Round 'em up and ship 'em out.

"Thank you for calling the Undisclosed Customer Service Center™ my name is blah blah blah..."

He starts out, clearly peturbed. "I was just on hold for 20 min and they hung up on me. I have a case already."

"I am sorry sir, but technical support is now closed, what time zone are you in?"

"What?"

"You will have to call back in the morning, what time zone are you in."


I hear him relay this to his wife/girlfriend banshee, "WHAT THE HELL? Give me that fucking phone!"

The banshee takes the phone, "Listen here, we have been waiting for 20 min, then we get hung up on. I have paid my money I want support! You will transfer me right fucking now!"

I try to explain to her that there is nothing I can do, once the tech queue is closed I can't transfer. If I try she would only get bounced through customer service again.

"THIS IS FUCKING RIDICULOUS!"


She puts the man back on the phone. "I paid money for support and I am not getting it, what kind of a sham are you people running?"

I love it when they say 'you people', "Well sir, our sister site in India is down due to civil unrest so we are working with only 20% staff. We are doing the best we can."

"Fine, I don't want to go to India anyway, give me an American."
He has Win98 there is nowhere to go but India. I explain that it is impossible, the queues are closed.

I offer to refund his money and as I am doing that, I am filling air by trying to explain to him why the last couple of days has been so busy. You know, chatting. Big mistake.

"You closed down a whole fucking country? Did the donkey die?"

"Ah sir, a beloved national figure passed away and they are in mourning."

"I don't give a fuck, that's your fault for outsourcing!"


< CLICK >

Ooops! Did I do that?

I realize that the rest of the free world finds this ridiculous and from a distance I suppose it is. But when someone tells you that someone else is dead the correct response is not 'I don't give a fuck'.

They call them 'ugly Americans' for a reason.

4 comments:

shelley said...

Yeah, but please don't paint us all with the same brush. We're not all like that.

Sigh.

Effin' crayon deserved the hook.

kelly said...

ok well i agree with him on the donkey thing, that was fuckin stupid. but yeah, a lot of him suck. and if we get shit for a snowday this winter, oooooh there's gonna be a revolt!

kelly again said...

not him THEM *sigh*

nadine said...

i think all off-shore activity support was down for a least a day.. and since about 90 percent of industry uses off shore .. i hope it wakes up some exec's who want to move more and more off-shore.