Friday, March 19, 2004

The soup Sub Nazi.

Last night at the Undisclosed Customer Service Center� the CSR�s were rewarded with free subs for meeting and exceeding customer satisfaction stats. This reward was strictly for CSR�s not techs, it is important to note this.

I was asked, at one point in the evening, to work security for the fridge. �Are you serious?�

�Yes, the subs are for the CSR�s and they only ordered enough for one for everyone.�

Great�.a cushy job off the phones. I soon realized that it was totally necessary. Is this high school? I thought you had to at least be the age of majority to work in this building? At first it was just directing everyone to which box held which variety of sub, but soon escalated into a full blown inquisition. I felt like the Sub Nazi. �Are you in CC? No? NO SUB FOR YOU!�

These subs were by no means a gourmet meal. They were crappy old cold cut subs. What was the fuckin� obsession with getting one by any means necessary? Why did grown men feel the need to deceive me in order to get one? One guy gave me a whole song and dance about how he always missed out on every free food day they had here at the Undisclosed Customer Service Center� because he was always diligently trying to help a customer and when he finally had time to go for the food, it was all gone.

�That is why I am here, because people like you wanted to take what wasn�t due them and you ended up with nothing. Suck it up, princess.� Later he walked by me with a sub in his mouth, he had gotten a girl in CC to get him one. Kids!

Another said, �I don�t see why the techs have been excluded.�

�Did you reach your customer satisfaction stats? No? Then NO SUB FOR YOU!�

Now there are hundreds of people working at the Undisclosed Customer Service Center� and I couldn�t possibly know all the ones in CC, so I would ask the question and since I figured these people were not twelve, they would answer truthfully. I figured wrong. Even a team manager in CC couldn�t get with the program, she actually went into the fridge (for the second time I found out later) and removed 2 subs and gave one to her boy-toy boyfriend who was a tech. What a great role model.

After my shift as the Sub Nazi I suggested that next time each team manager receive a ticket for each person on their team, no ticket, no sub. Simple. Of course I have no confidence that management will take my suggestion.

That would make sense, and sense just baffles these people.

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