Friday, February 13, 2004

Notorious or�s a toss up!

I walk into the grocery store today to pay my power bill. This is Canada, we multi task here, it�s just way too fucking cold to be getting in and out of the car any more than we have to. Anyway, I walk into the store and one of the check-out girls looks at me and says, �Hey, Evel, heard you tore a strip off some guy at the rink the other night?�

�Your kidding.�

�Nope, it�s all over town. One of the mothers said, �some fool said something stupid in front of Evel and she went up one side of him and down the other.� I laughed till I choked, wish I had have been there. Call me next time?�

�I don�t plan these things.�
Well I don�t!

I am the kind of person that does not keep things bottled up inside. I will not mull stuff over, I will not count to ten and then respond. I do not let things bother me. And if you talk about me behind my back, better make damn sure I never find out cuz I will call you on that shit.

For example. Barbie (not her real name, just what I call her, stick figure, blonde, you get the idea) decides she is going to sit with us one night at work, cuz we have �all the fun� as she puts it. She starts to set up her computer and I get a call. I am trying to get Mr. BigShot�s info and all I hear is her high pitched voice. I look at her and give the sign. I point to my ear and mouth the words, I AM ON THE PHONE! She proceeds to apologize, ����.loudly�����.to me!

I shoot her a look that would kill, all the while talking sweetly to Mr. BigShot with my finger in my other ear. She persists, �I didn�t know I was talking that loud, I will shut up now.� But she doesn�t, she has some sort of verbal diarrhea. Finally, I turn around and give her both fingers, TWICE! She shuts up, and I finish the call.

As soon as I hang up, I turn to her and point to my ear, �When I do this, it means SHUT THE HELL UP!� Then I give her the fingers again and say, �And when I do this?� (both fingers thrust into the air in front of her face) �It means you have 2 fucking seconds to shut your yap, before I back hand you, kapiche?�

I am a nice person, but if I don�t like where you got it, I can tell you where to put it.

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