Saturday, April 19, 2003

Welcome to Undisclosed Customer Service Center�. What the fuck do you want? How may I help you today?

Ok, yesterday I was a little freaked out. We sat with a coach and �role played� and were marked for it. Luckily I remembered that I could put her on hold if I didn�t know what to do and actually ask her. I put her on hold 3 times in one call.

After lunch the instructor sent the ones who �got� it, out on the floor. We were supposed to work the tools while the CSR did the talking. I was doing ok, she at one point was pointing frantically at the computer screen, but nothing blew up or anything.

Then the instructor, we will call him Don, (since he was wearing a Hawaiian shirt on this particular day) does the little �thumb and pinkie� motion and mouths �Did you take a call yet?�.


The CSR informs me that I have to actually talk to a customer before I leave for the day. At this point my head starts pounding. You know the feeling that your blood is trying to escape your body from any orifice it can find and apparently that would be the roots of your hair.

I get through it without totally screwing it up. Then the phone rings again.

�That was great, do one more.�


Well she says that 4 more times. Finally, its time to clock out.

�You did great�. (I am still unconvinced)

I think a couple of them caught on that maybe this was my first time on the phones but thankfully they were nice about it. One man, with a deep southern accent, was giving me his information and after I apologised three times for asking him to repeat something he said, �Dant worray dawlin, yer doin faan�.

I left there with a pounding headache and a hemeroid.

I suppose I should file that last bit under �too much information�, oh well.

We get the weekend off, and one more day (Monday) of training and then they set us loose on the place.

I guess I just have to remember that the people calling up are more confused than I am and they probably aren�t calling up to confirm launch codes or anything like that. So if they get redirected to the wrong place it will not result in nuclear meltdown.

The fate of the free world is not in my hands. (Thank fuck for that, eh!) Just relax, breathe and give it my best shot.

"Thank you for calling Undisclosed Customer Service Center�, you have a good day."

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