Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Conversation with the squirrels living at Kelly's mother's house.

"Dudes, you have to stop eating the bird seed."

"What are you talking about, she puts it out for us."

"No, she puts it out for the birds."

"Uh, I didn't' see a label, and 'hello' it has nuts, I am a squirrel."

"I realize that the woman is putting food out where you can see/smell it but it is not for you."

"But it is up in the tree, that is where we live, I tell you it is for us."

"No, sorry, it is for the birds."

"Fuck the birds, those shit factories fly south, it is totally for us."


"Ok, what about the stuff she hangs on the clothesline, that has got to be meant for us, birds don't live on poles."

"Sorry, wrong again."

"She does realize that she is sending us mixed signals, right? Shit, you think that is why the man-boy is shooting at us? I thought he was shooting at the birds?"

"For some reason she thinks you are smarter than the birds and can read the memo she sent."

"What memo, I didn't' get the memo, did you get the memo?"

"What does he have against squirrels? We don't shit on his car. Although...fuck it, I'll give it a shot."

"Hold on there..."

"No worries, Woody, we got 'er covered."

1 comment:

kelly said...