Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Just because your you're paranoid does not mean people are not out to get you.

I just wanted some coffee cream and sour cream. That's all. Is that so much to ask?

Apparently I had a contract out on me today. That is the only way to describe it. I felt like every other person on the planet was out to get me. Starting with my downstairs neighbor.

I come out to get in the car and she has me blocked into the driveway. WTF? The driveway is three cars wide once you get inside. But she parks right in the entry. Fuck you, I drove up on the lawn and escaped.

Then I am behind this idiot that is going 10 and swerving all over the road. It made a quarter mile ride take about 10 minutes. I finally get into the store, guess what? No sour cream.

Back on the road again. And again, I am behind this idiot who can't read a speed limit sign and has no idea what a turn signal is. He narrowly misses getting clipped by a semi.

The next store in line is also out of sour cream and they seem to think that their coffee cream is worth a dollar more than everywhere else. NOT. I am waiting to turn out on to the road from the parking lot when some crazy old guy flies out of left field and cuts right out in front of me.

Finally I get safely? into the grocery store. Well the automatic door was acting like someone was controlling it. Every time I stepped through it, it would close on me. It took three tries and finally I jumped through like Tom Cruis on MI.

This all without my morning coffee. It had better be worth it. I get my cream's and head for the checkout. A little girl who is way too young to have a little girl runs her cart up the back of my ankle. FUCK! I can feel that she has tore the skin. What next? I refrain from strangling the bitch, I just need coffee.

A two minute trip to the store, takes 40 minutes. I am not a happy camper.


Grog said...

Poor Muffin :P

I'm curious why you didn't hit Timmy's on the way ?

xX--JFP--Xx said...

Fuck...sounds like you're having my kind of luck.