Thursday, May 29, 2008

Let them shit in the woods.

My brother has a bear. Not by choice, he didn't invite the thing to his house, but there she is anyway, with a baby, eating his compost bin.

I have seen it. I am not impressed, I avoid their place like the plague.

He is at the point where he has to drive his kids to school because they can't wait for the bus,the bear is there, just walking around.

He called the Department of Lands and Forests, they came up and shot it with rubber bullets. WTF? All that did was piss it off.

So then they tell him to just not compost (which by the way is against the law here). There's a solution, get rid of its food so it will come closer to the house and perhaps try and get in.

Since my brother does not hunt, shooting it is not an option. He refuses to purchase a gun, go through all the training and registration just to get rid of this one bear. And it would take serious weaponry to get rid of this one.

"Get yourself a gallon of anti-freeze." I say.

Nurse Darling, his wife, squeals. "Evel!"

"What? You douse the compost and 12 hours later the bitch is in a coma in the woods somewhere. Problem solved."

"What about the baby?"

"He'll probably eat it too, they die together."

So far, they have not tried the anti-freeze thing. I offered to do it for them, but they balked.

If it were me, I would call the Lands and Forests and say, "There are two options for this bear. Either you come and take it away, or it dies. Your choice." Either way, I would not be dealing with a bear.

What? Are they supposed to wait till one of their kids gets mauled by this thing?


kelly said...

For Christ's sake don't call the RCMP, they'll torture it first LMAO Takes them 5 shots to get a bear in a tree, I dunno man. Tis the season, bears are awake and huuuungry!

shirl said...

Call a trapper, they would be more than happy to make some money, and get rid of the problem. OR call the DNR back and say that the kids are in danger (which they are) and get them to set a live trap.

That girl said...

I hate bears. I don't understand why everyone is always afraid 'the bear might get hurt'.

We had a similar problem in our cul-de-sac. My neighbour videotaped it eating our garbage outside. All we got told to do is not put our garbage bins outside overnight anymore. WTF?