Friday, June 29, 2007

New Age Spirituality

"Finding and touching your spiritual core."

I am sitting here watching Vision TV. (The remote is across the room) This dude is praying to the gods and goddesses (rolls eyes). I thought the hippies were all dead? Not so, they are all in Colorado on some commune.

It is kinda interesting watching crazy people. After a while you listen less to what they say and start imagining how these people function in a way that lets them feed themselves. Then you realize they feed off each other.

Sandplay for the Soul: You pick shells off a shelf and place them into a sandbox. Apparently this will allow you to recoup from your childhood traumas. Oh, there are also action figures on the shelf....this is some deep shit. "This is your soul speaking to you." Apparently his soul needs Leggo figures to get his point across.

I will spare you the commentary on the tantric sex segment.

Luckily for them, there are other whacko's out there who will pay them for this shit.

Some nutbar, (white guy) dressed in African garb is sitting on the floor, burning incense trying to 'cure' some gay guy of his gayness. I kid you not. I watched for a couple minutes until he started praying. I am starting to suspect that it's not incense he is burning. "We ask the guidance of God and the Goddess, the angels, Michael, Rafael..."

That's when I snapped, lunged across the room for the remote, scaring the cat half to death. I draw the line at praying to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

Wouldn't they all be so pissed if we could prove that the Hokey Pokey is what it is really all about?


adele said...

shit your funny!!Adele

Yvette said...

When I read "Some nutbar, (white guy) dressed in African garb" I honestly thought you were going to talk about the guy from work. If you need more details on him let me know... I'm surprised you haven't mentioned him yet :o)

Evel said...

I really need to get a little voice recorder...I forget half the funny shit that happens. I will have to explore Weird Office Guy #2 now that Jimmy has moved on.

Cattiva said...

curing of gayness? HAHAHA That brings to mind those radical religious "camps" to "cure gayness." TOO FUNNY!

You really need to get another remote!

kelly said...

glue the remote to the arm of the chair! haha