I kid you not.
"Thank you for calling the Undisclosed Customer Service Center™ my name is blah blah blah..."
"I just bought a new computer and I can't get on the internet."
"Who is your internet service provider?"
"What is that?" Sigh, the internet is not free and I am not magic.
"I just got a new laptop, it says it is equipped with wireless internet, but I can't connect wirelessly."
"What type of router are you using?"
"Huh?" She does not have a wireless router. I try to explain to her that her laptop has to get a signal from something that is hardwired, before it can send a wireless signal to her laptop. This takes about 10 minutes and I am not convinced she gets it.
"I can't seem to open up my Netscape."
"Have you thought about calling Netscape at all?"
"Huh?"
"I don't have my contract number, can you look it up under my company?"
"No, sorry."
"Why not?
"Well, anyone could call up and say they are from Gen.era.l Mot.ors, pretty sure they would have a contract with us."
"But what if I really was from Gen.era.l Mot.ors?"
"Then you would have the contract number."
"Ya, I was just talking to Amanda and the phone went dead."
"Did you have a case number?"
"No, but can you just transfer me back to Amanda?"
"Uh, there are more than a few Amanda's here." Hell, you can't swing a cat in here without hitting one.
"She said she was in Las Colinas if that helps." With 62,000 employees world wide, I am pretty sure I could not find this guys Amanda.
Ya sure, it's just me answering the phones and Amanda taking the tech calls. Oh, and the janitor, Gerry.
"Ya, one of your sites are down."
"Which one?"
"E bay dot com."
"That's not our site, sir. I can get you a number though..."
"What do you mean it's not your site. It's on the internet."
"Sir, this is the Undisclosed Computer Software Company™, we..." He cuts me off again.
"YOU ARE THE INTERNET!" Holy crap, are people really that thick?
5 comments:
i had one call and say we made the game he had. then he goes oh, i know you didn't make it but i thought you'd have their number...did i say information when i answered the phone? dumbasses...
do you get any MAC calles?
Wait, you're not the internet? Does Al Gore have a website you could direct them to? He invented the internet after all.
Ya, even if they have a Mac, they still use our software. I love it when the PC people say they are going to switch to a Mac, like it makes a difference to us.
OMG... so many with so little clue.
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