No one wants to steal it.
Took Milton out for his morning constitutional, and found my passenger side door wide open as well as the glove box.
The keys were on the seat where I left them.
Note to would-be thief: You could have at least tidied up. And where were you raised? In a barn? Close the fucking door!
Luckily the dome light has been busted for a while, otherwise the battery would be dead.
Everyone is always so proud to show off a new car or a new phone or new whatever. I have a little crappy car. It works, and nobody wants to steal it.